It is very likely that I'm not posting on the right topic, but due to the array of conditions I have found it difficult to make a proper identification.
My problem goes like this: my father in law has congestive heart failure, which is the main condition, type II diabetics, cirrhosis and type B hepatitis. He also developed ascites and a generalized edema in lower body. He hasn't been able to move for the past 4 months and has been released from hospital due to end stage conditions.
Also, he has very large varicose veins and his legs are filled with puss which is leaking through skin cracks.
Lately his urine output has decreased to about 200 ml/day, his food intake decreased to the equivalent of one slice of bread a day, has a disturbed sleep pattern (doesn't sleep at night, sometimes naps during the day, sometimes he falls asleep in the middle of a conversation etc) and he is very emotional (cries then laughs, then yells, then cries again).
My husband and I are aware of the fact that his conditions are terminal, but we have found out that he smokes (he had quit more than 4 years ago) and drinks (wine, martini, brandy) and also he self-medicates.
He lives with his elderly mother and has 2 nurses taking shifts. The nurses do not give him alcohol or cigarettes and they throw away everything they find, but we believe that his mother gives in to his every demand and purchases the items for him.
We can not keep an eye on him 24/7 and there is no log term care facility available in our area. No hospital will take him, claiming that he could die at any moment and nothing remains to be done for him.
So we are virtually watching him kill himself. I believe he is not aware of what he is doing, especially mixing alcohol and medication, because he claims that he is regaining strength and that he will be out of bed in no time. Also, he is not aware that he has edema or ascites (he claims he has gained weight), nor does he see the puss coming out of his legs. He thinks that the puss is sweat. Also, he feels no pain at all, and I have noticed that he has lost sensation in his legs. If I touch his legs and he is not aware, he does not feel that, not even tickling his foot.
I really do not know what to do, how to put a stop to these habits. He is killing himself and we seem unable to do anything.