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dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/13/2013 3:03 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi everyone, thanks for taking the time to read this.
 
It all started about 6 weeks ago.  Dizzy, lightheaded, blood pressure going up like crazy, feeling of passing out and chest flutters, several trips to ER and my GP.  Was hospitalized, tests ran were gall bladder, eeg, ekg, sonograms on heart, gall bladder, endoscopy.  No definite diagnoses made.  Nuclear stress test showed heart to be good.  Also sonograms on neck arteries.  Every thing checked good.  Blood pressure medicine changed from Toprol xl to lisonopril, a motion sickness patch and prontix for stomach acid.
 
The other day I was sitting on the couch and felt the flutter.  I decided to feel my pulse in my neck.  Another flutter and I could feel that my pulse stopped, then picked up rapidly before settling down.  Sometimes I can feel these flutters through my eyes, it feels like pressure goes up into my eyes.
 
After feeling the lack of pulse, I contacted my cardiologist.  He put me on a 24 holter monitor, which I finished today.  Will drop it off at the cardio tomorrow.
 
Also 2 years ago I had SVT, my heart rate was 250 in the ER.  I had the ablation to take care of that.
 
I have read that pvc's are nothing to worry about, that they are normal, but I don't feel normal.
 
Has anyone been cured of PVC's, or just forgot about having them?  I read that magnesium could help, so I got me a powerade that has potasium and magnesium in it.
 
I guess I need some reassurance, that what I have is pvc and that everything will be ok.

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/15/2013 9:00 AM (GMT -6)   
Its me again.
 
I am having these flutters more frequently.  Sometimes it feels like my heart stops for a good 3 seconds.  Monitor is off and back at the cardio doc.  I hope I hear something soon.
 
This is driving me crazy.  I am so afraid that my heart is just going to stop.  I am actually trying to get everything in order for my family.

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 3/15/2013 11:48 AM (GMT -6)   
 
May I ask what your Cardiologist instructed you to do if the flutters were bothering you?
 
It does feel like you are experiencing a lot of stress and anxiety with the " heart flutter".  I understand this kind of anxiety and what has worked for me is seeing a therapist. 
 

I hope that you can get to a resolution regarding this situation. Please feel free to post anytime you need to talk about how you are feeling. We are here to support you and offer help when we can.

Kindly,

Kitt

 


~~Kitt~~
Moderator: Anxiety, Osteoarthritis,
GERD/Heartburn and Heart/Cardiovascular Disease.



"The wind blows, the sun rises, the snow falls and the ocean relentlessly pounds the shore. Life rolls on with fresh new possibilities at every turn."

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/15/2013 12:42 PM (GMT -6)   
Thank you Kitt.  I really need a lot of support right now.
 
My cardiologist didn't tell me what to do about the flutters.  When I seen him tuesday he just tried to educate me on the beats.  He said what I am probably feeling was pre-beats.  He said the pre-beat I could not feel, then the heart gets back in rythym and I feel the stronger beat followed by another beat.
 
He looked at my records and said he did not capture any pvcs, so he had me wear a 24 monitor and I had to record the events in a log.  My wife returned the monitor to his office at about 4 oclock yesterday.  I don't know if they have read it or if they will wait until my next visit which is on the 26th.
 
My GP gave me ativan to help with anxiety.  I took the first one yesterday, didn't really help any at all.
 
I am not ready to die, there is so much more that I need to do for my family.
 
 

Rxclusion
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2013
Total Posts : 165
   Posted 3/15/2013 1:15 PM (GMT -6)   
Hello,
It's great you were able to get a good amount of test done!
I am taking the slower "turtle" route at the moment as I just met with a cardiologist.
I have previously had an Echocardiogram and a 24 Hr Holter Monitor and both of those came back fine.
I saw my cardiologist and he reviewed the previous Echo, Holter, and an EKG he had done when I was in his office. He said that the left side of my heart was bigger than he thought it would be but other than that everything looked ok on my Echocardiogram. He has sent me to do a sleep study and a 14 day event monitor. I am currently wearing the event monitor and have a good week and a half still to go. My sleep study isn't until the 10th of April and I don't return to my cardiologist until the 13th of May. A little disconcerting to have to wait nearly two months for a Dx but I guess you have to do what you have to. Currently I can not sleep and am disturbed by heart flutters every night. I have tried various remedies to no avail. My cardiologist said it is possible that I have PVCs and if that is the case it is nothing life threatening and that he wanted to rule out anything major before giving me a definite Dx. It is a bit frustrating to be in pain or discomfort for so long without getting an answer. I have had my share of ER runs in the past two months alone that make me uncomfortable.
Hopefully everything comes back Ok with your results and maybe you will get an answer.
I know where you are coming from and it is not fun. :(
I take Xanax for anxiety and to sleep at night at this point, it sedates me just enough for me to just pass out. But that's all I can do, sleeping naturally is very hard for me to do right now. I usually just collapse from exhaustion after trying to sleep for a long long time. It has disrupted my daily life and I am just grasping for some type of answer.
-Rxclusion
Dx:
General Anxiety Disorder
Tachycardia
Acid Reflux/GERD

Rx:
Atenolol 50MG
Omeprazole 20MG
One-a-Day Men's Multivitamin
Xanax 0.25MG PRN
Ambien 10MG PRN

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/15/2013 1:25 PM (GMT -6)   
Thank you so very much. How does the Doctor expect someone to live with this flutter, skipped beat. Everytime it happens I feel like I am dying just a little more. I feel like I am waiting for it to stop.

I am trying to read about surgeries or medicine for this. I know the surgery for the SVT was great.

OMG, just had another flutter, this time in my throat, chest and down into my stomach.

Rxclusion
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2013
Total Posts : 165
   Posted 3/15/2013 1:45 PM (GMT -6)   
I understand what you mean. It is hard to feel normal whenever you are constantly aware of a flutter or skipped beat. I myself just feel weak in my chest area in general, like my heart is just pumping it's last rounds.
-Rxclusion
Dx:
General Anxiety Disorder
Tachycardia
Acid Reflux/GERD

Rx:
Atenolol 50MG
Omeprazole 20MG
One-a-Day Men's Multivitamin
Xanax 0.25MG PRN
Ambien 10MG PRN

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/15/2013 2:01 PM (GMT -6)   
Rxclusion,

You are so right my friend. It is causing me so much grief. It is so hard to function.

Yesterday I had a meltdown. I tried to convince myself that I was not dying. I believe I had a panic attack. Left arm was tingling, chest tight. But I also had an ocular migraine, so things just kept piling up on me. When I got home my wife knew something was wrong. I went to bed and she gave me a ativant. It didn't. I laid in bed and cried like a baby. This panic lasted about 90 mins. This morning at work the same thing.

Thank you all for listening.

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 3/16/2013 9:44 AM (GMT -6)   
Good Morning dspeak,
 
Just one purely medical question: I assume your thyroid has been checked recently? Arrhythmias, as you probably know, do occur commonly with thyroid disorders.

If your thyroid is OK, and your heart has been repeatedly checked out and found to be OK, too, then, as you suspect, the problem is how to deal with the fear.
 
You might try talking with a psychotherapist to see if you could learn some biofeedback or other mental exercises to help you calm yourself. Another resource that might help you is a small, inexpensive book by Dr. Claire Weekes called "Hope and Help for Your Nerves." It explains some of the physical manifestations of fear and offers some techniques for dealing.

Fear can be treated successfully, but those who are serious about getting relief are more likely to find it if they are aggressive about seeking help and flexible in their approaches to treatment.  
 
I have lived with anxiety for 30 years and when it is really knocking me around I think I will never be normal again but with the help of my Pdoc and therapy I usually can make it through.
 
Blessings to you and do every thing in your power not to let anxiety win.
 
Kindly,
Kitt
~~Kitt~~
Moderator: Anxiety, Osteoarthritis,
GERD/Heartburn and Heart/Cardiovascular Disease.



"The wind blows, the sun rises, the snow falls and the ocean relentlessly pounds the shore. Life rolls on with fresh new possibilities at every turn."

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/17/2013 9:43 AM (GMT -6)   
Kitt,
 
My thyroid showed to be on the low side of the scale but not below.  I was on thyroid medicine but my new doctor took me off because I was not under the scale.  Also I was having some flutters when I was on this medicine and the toprol xl for my bp.
 
It is funny, I read where it bothers everyone at night.  My flutters don't keep me up or wake me. 

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/18/2013 7:40 AM (GMT -6)   
Here it is Monday, and still feel the same. Woke up feeling good, showered and felt great.

Now at work and I feel awful. I am thinking of taking a ativant to see if that will help. I feel very light in the chest. Have been having flutters all morning.

Wish my heart doc would call with the results on the halter monitor.

I just feel like my heart is going to stop at any time.

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/20/2013 8:34 AM (GMT -6)   
Well hopefully today I will get the results from the 24 halter.
 
I know one thing for sure, whatever is going on with my heart has got me to trying to take better care of myself.
 
Somethings I have noticed.
 
I have not had a problem with the flutters waking my up at night.
My flutters are not back to back, or have not been so far.  I will have a flutter and may not have another for anywhere from a minute to several minutes to hours.
Usually when I lay down on the couch after getting home from work, I will feel winded, then I will usually have a flutter or two.
Last nite I had a flutter, just a single one that gave me a pain in the middle of my chest, and it felt like a thump.
I know that when I get these flutters, I also have to fight anxiety.  I have taken .5 mg of ativan.  This seems to have helped not only the anxiety but the flutter too.
 
I have started taking a multi vitamin and drinking V8 juice.  I figure they can't hurt me and surly they can help in some way.
 
Will let everyone know what the Dr says on the halter.

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/20/2013 12:35 PM (GMT -6)   
Well I was hoping that by now I would have talked to the nurse.

While I am waiting I am having the flutters and pulse is slow, then speeds up, then slows down.

I am really scared.

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/20/2013 3:37 PM (GMT -6)   
One thing I forgot to mention.  My throat feels thick.  Feels like it is swollen, but of course it does not hurt.  When I bend my head forward and try to swallow, it is almost impossible.
 
Don't know if this has anything to do with PVCs or the prontonix for stomach acid.  I didn't take one this morning thinking it was making my heart skip.
 
I've not had a skip since 3:15, its 4:35 now.  Took the ativan at 1:45.
Had skips about every5 to 7 mins from 1:30 until 3:15.
 
Still no word from Doctors nurse on holter monitor.

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/21/2013 8:51 AM (GMT -6)   
Well finally got through to the nurse to find out results on holter monitor. I was not happy. She said Dr said everything looked ok except where I pushed event and showed a rapid heart beat. Nurse said Dr. said only thing that can fix that is put me back on toprol. Toprol is what I believed was the cause of all my problems to start with. Nurse said Dr. would discuss all that with me next tuesday. I then told the nurse that I did not have a event monitor, that I wrote down on a log sheet everytime I had a flutter. She told me to bring that in. I said, it was turned in with the monitor. She then said she would try and find it.

I am so upset right now. Whos monitor did they check. Was it mine, someone elses.

I feel like finding another cardio doc. My ears are ringing, I feel lightheaded again. I am so frustrated!!

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/25/2013 7:10 AM (GMT -6)   
Friday was a horrible day. I thought things were under control. I made it until 2:30 then I freaked out. Flutters were bothering me so bad. I really thought I was having a mental breakdown. I held it together until I go home. I freaked out. My bp was 185/ 94. This made things worse. My pulse was 120, even worse. My wife called my Dr, he said to take me to the ER, they could give me something to calm me down. The ER is a 30 minute ride from the house. Half way there I began settleing down. I remembered someone on here saying how pvcs don't show up in the Dr office or ER, because you feel like you are somewher safe and the anxiety eases. I think that happened to me. Instead of the ER we went to my Dr. he is a wonder Dr., he saw me even though he was busy. They did an ekg, of course nothing. He put me back on thyroid medicine and gave me a script for Zoloft. My pulse is running in the low 60's, I read that Zoloft can cause you pulse to slow. I am still having flutters, feels like they are in my throat. Also I had a flutter and I felt my whole back get warm and a little pain in my left chest area. I am so scared. I don't want to die from this but I feel like I am going to. I feel like the Drs are not taking it serious. I have prayed and prayed. I am scared.

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 3/26/2013 2:52 PM (GMT -6)   
Got back from seeing my cardiologist today. He went over the results from the holter monitor.

Over a 24 hr period I threw 159 PVCs with 136,000 beats. He of course was not concerned with the PVCs as he was with my heart rate. Avg 95.

I told him I had contracted a stomach virus and that for about 20 hours of the monitor I was sick in bed with a terrible headache and diarhea. He said that was probably why the high rate. He debated about putting my to Toprol but ended up not doing so. He wants to see how the thyroid and Zoloft medicines do.

I don't know if anyone is reading this or even cares, but today I have felt the best I have in awhile. It may be the Zoloft, I don't want to jinx anything, but I have had a few flutters, but they have not been as intense as before. Once again is this because of the zoloft?

socal4d9d
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2013
Total Posts : 3
   Posted 4/15/2013 5:22 PM (GMT -6)   
hi dspeak,

I read through your thread and can relate on so many levels. I suffered with SVT for years until I got an ablation. and while that took care of the SVT I still to this day have PVC's. And even after so many years I never really get used to them. When I get stressed and things pile on they show up like clock-work. Just this weekend I passed a kidney stone for the first time and of course it freaked me out. and guess who has shown up? mr PVC...I even went to the ER prior to my Kidney stone episode and had an ekg done and of course it was fine.

I don't undertand how people say they just forget about them or don't notice them because they hit me so hard. Sometimes when I get them I have to come back here or look them up on the web just to remind myself that they are harmless and I'm not gonna die from them.

I hope you're feeling better and wish you good luck.

dspeak
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 26
   Posted 4/16/2013 7:45 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Socal4d9d

Thank you for your concern. Since my last post I have continued with the thyroid medicine and zoloft. I also take ativan when needed through out the day when I feel like I am about to have a breakdown. The PVCs have just about stopped. I still get a skipped beat once in awhile and when I do, I can feel pressue in my eyes. The medicine for stomach acid I think is causing some problems. Sometimes it is hard to swallow and somtimes it feels like I can't breathe properly. But I do breathe ok, it just feels that way. I have chills and at the same time I will feel hot.

I went to another Cardio clinic. These guys were great. I a stress test, electro cardiogram and another holter. Everything checked fine except the pics from the stress. There was a shadow on the bottom of my heart. I then went back for a CT scan on my heart and arteries. I don't know why they don't do this first. They say it is as good as a cathater, better even. I am waiting the results on that now. They are suppose to call me today.

I feel for you, I really do, because it can be so scary. Even with all the reassurances when you have one of them it scares you. Then anxiety starts. Happedned to me, I felt like I was going out of my mind. I really thought I was having a breakdown. Thats when my Dr put me on Zoloft. It seems to be helping. Are you taking anything?

hotbiker2480
New Member


Date Joined Apr 2013
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 4/23/2013 2:05 AM (GMT -6)   
HI EVERYONE...
     MY NAME IS JUDI...I STARTED WITH MY FIRST PVC/PAC IN 1988, ON THE RIDE SPACE MOUNTAIN IN FLORIDA :(  SCARED THE crap OUT OF ME THEN, AND THEY HAVE BEEN DOING SO EVER SINCE.
 
     BEEN TO 33 CARDIOLOGISTS, BECAUSE EVERYTIME WAS THE SAME ANSWERS.  "YOUR NOT GOING TO DIE, THEY ARE NOT GOING TO KILL YOU..YOUR JUST ONE OF THE UNLUCKY ONES WHO IS VERY SENSATIVE TO FEELING THEM".....BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.
 
     ANYWAYS...DURING THE COURSE OF ALL THE DR.S...THEY PUT ME ON EVERYTHING...FROM VERAPAMIL TO MEXILITENE, TO METROPOLOL...AND MANY, MANY OTHERS.  NONE OF THEM HELPED. 
 
     I LIVED IN FEAR CONSTANTLY AND IN RETURN ENDED UP WITH SEVERE ANXIETY AND PANIC DISORDER FROM THE PVC'S/PAC'S. :( 
 
     about 8 YRS AGO , I WENT TO A HOMEOPATHIC DR. AND SHE CHANGED MY LIFE!  SHE PUT ME ON MAGNELEUVRES(BY SEAROYAL OR GENESTRA)....1/2 A SACHET IN THE AM AND 1/2 AT NIGHT.  SHE ALSO HAD ME TAKING CRATAGEUS OXYCANTHA (HAWTHORN BERRY)...1/2 TSP. IN SMALL AMOUNT OF WATER 3 TIMES A DAY.
 
     WOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW...SHE CHANGED MY LIFE!
     AT MY LOWEST POINT, I ALMOST TRIED COMMITING SUICIDE BECAUSE I COULDN'T LIVE WITH THESE DEMONS IN MY CHEST...BUT DOING WHAT SHE TOLD ME, SAVED MY LIFE.
 
     WELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL....THINGS HAVE CHANGED AND I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO SEE MY HOMEOPATHIC FOR ALMOST 4 YRS. NOW DUE TO THE FACT THAT SHE ISN'T COVERED BY THE INSURANCE, AND I AM ON DISABILITY....AND MONEY IS EXTREMELY TIGHT. :(
 
     I'VE BEEN about 8 YRS. OF BEING ABLE TO COPE WITH A FEW HERE AND THERE...BUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT about A  MONTH AGO.....HERE THEY CAME...WITH A VENGENCE....AND I CURSE THE THINGS!
 
     I JUST DROPPED OFF A 48 HOUR HOLTER MONITOR TO MY CARDIO...HOPEFULLY WILL GET THE RESULTS THIS WEEK AND I'M PETRIFIED TO HEAR THEM!  OMG...I HAD 7 FULLLLLLLLLLLLLL PAGES FOR A DIARY! 
     THEY HAVE COME BACK JUST AS BAD OR IF NOT WORSE THAN YEARS AGO!  I'M 52 NOW, AND I CANNOT HANDLE THEM!
 
     I'VE BEEN IN MAJOR DEPRESSION FOR MANY, MANY YEARS NOW, AND ALSO HAVE FIBROMYALGIA REALLY BAD...EPSTIEN BARR VIRUS...ANXIETY AND PANIC DISORDER....OSTEOARTHRITIS...DEGENERATIVE ARTHRITIS...OCCIPITAL NEURALGIA...AND OF COURSE THE PVC'S AND PAC'S.
 
     THE TERROR THAT GOES THROUGH MY BODY IS JUST UNIMAGINABLE...BUT I MUST SAY...SITTING HERE READING THESE MESSAGES...DOES PUT MY MIND AT EASE A BIT.  I'M NOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT THE ONLY ONE!
 
     YOU CANNOT HELP BUT THINK YOUR GOING TO DIE.
     LIKE I'VE TOLD ALLLLLLLLLLL MY DR.S.....I WAKE UP WONDERING IF THIS WILL BE THE DAY I DIE FROM THEM...AND I GO TO BED WONDERING IF I'M GOING TO WAKE UP THE NEXT MORNING.  LIVING IN COMPLETE FEAR IS NOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT NORMAL!
 
     I LIVE ON MY XANAX, BECAUSE IT IS TRULY THE ONLY MED THAT CALMS ME DOWN.  THE ONLY OTHER MEDS I TAKE ARE MY ZOLOFT FOR MY DEPRESSION AND OMEPERAZOLE FOR MY STOMACH.
 
     I TOO ALSO FIND THAT AFTER I EAT A LARGE MEAL I GET MORE OF THEM...
     MINE DON'T CARE WHAT TIME OF DAY IT IS...THEY JUST STAY WITH ME ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL DAY LONG..ONE, AFTER ANOTHER, AFTER ANOTHER, AFTER ANOTHER. 
 
     YEARS AGO I HAD A PET SCAN OF MY HEART...(ALL CAME OUT FINE).  MY STRESS TESTS HAVE ALL COME OUT FINE...MY BLOODWORK ALL CAME OUT FINE...BUT I'M NOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT FINE!
 
     THE LAST HOLTER I HAD, SHOWED ALMOST 30,000 OF THEM IN A 24 HR. PERIOD!  NOW, I'M DREADING GETTING THE RESULTS OF THIS ONE :(  PETRIFIED.
 
     THE THUD,...THE BANG...THE HEAD RUSHES...THE LIGHT HEADEDNESS...THE FREAKIN ADRENALINE RUSH THAT I GET IS ENOUGH TO PULL MY HAIR OUT OF MY HEAD.
 
     WHY, AFTER 8 YRS. OF THEM BASICALLY NOT EXISITING...WOULD THEY COME BACK?
 
     YES, I AM UNDER A HUGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE AMOUNT OF STRESS.  I AM AN ONLY CHILD...MY HOUSE IS ATTATCHED TO MY PARENTS.  MY MOM GOT DIAGNOSED WITH PARKINSONS DISEASE about 15 YRS. AGO...AND NOW IT IS STARTING TO GET REALLY, REALLY HORRIFIC :(  SO I TAKE CARE OF HER.  THEN, MY FATHER HAS HAD FIVE MAJOR OPERATIONS IN THE PAST FIVE YEARS...HE JUST HAD HIS 3RD HIP REPLACEMENT ON MARCH 25, AND IS NOW I A NURSING HOME FOR REHAB...AND THEY DO NOT EXPECT HIM TO BE ABLE TO COME HOME UNTIL MAY 23!  SO IT'S RUN MY MOM UP TO SEE HIM EVERY SINGLE DAY :( 
 
     THEN, LONG STORY SHORT...MY BOYFRIEND (I CALL HIM MY HUSBAND..WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 13 YRS. NOW...HAS BEEN IN A FEDERAL PRISON FOR 4 YRS..(NO VIOLENT CRIME...JUST TAX EVASION)....WE HAVE A HUGE HOUSE AND YARD TO TAKE CARE OF AND IT'S ALL IN MY HANDS....EVERY SINGLE FREAKING PART OF EVERYTHING IS IN MY HANDS....AND I'M WORN OUT.  I DON'T SLEEP HARDLY AT ALL...WHICH I KNOW IS HORRIBLE...AND I AM WORKING ON CHANGING THAT.
 
     I AM A VEGETARIAN AND EAT VERY HEALTHY.  I WAS EXCERCISING AT LEAST 4 TIMES A WEEK, UNTIL about A YEAR AGO, THEN I STOPPED...COULD NEVER FIND THE TIME TO DO IT WITH TAKING MY PARENTS TO ALL THEIR DR.'S APPTS...AND ALL OF MINE...TAKING CARE OF THE TWO OF THEM...AND LOSING MY HUBBY IN THE BLINK OF AN EYE....SO YES, I'M STRESSED BEYOND BEING STRESSED...IS THAT WHY THEY'VE COME BACK?  IS THAT WHY THEY ARE ONE AFTER THE OTHER CONSTANTLY?
 
      ALL I KNOW, IS THE FEELING I GET WHEN I GET THEM, IS ONCE AGAIN DRIVING ME INSANE.
 
     MY AGORAPHOBIA IS KICKING IN AGAIN..I'M PETRIFIED TO GO ANYWHERE....MY NERVES ARE WRECKED COMPLETELY.
 
     about A WEEK AGO I SENT FOR SOME MAGNESIUM MALATE...AND SOME HAWTHORN BERRY TEA...(BOTH GREAT THINGS TO REGULATE THE HEART)...AND I MUST SAY I DO SEE A DIFFERENCE SINCE I'VE STARTED TAKING IT...BUT OMG...I JUST CAN'T TAKE THEM ANYMORE!
 
     YEARS AGO I BEGGED FOR THE ABLATION.....I EVEN WROTE A LETTER TO THE DR. WHO INVENTED IT, AND HE TOLD ME I WASN'T A GOOD CANDIDATE FOR IT!  KNOCKED ME RIGHT OFF MY PEG! :(  SAID I WAS GETTING THEM IN ALL DIFFERENT AREAS OF MY HEART...SO FOR THEM TO GO IN, AND BURN ALL THE AREAS...MY HEART WOULD BE SCREWED UP...WHEN IN FACT..MY HEART IS IN GOOD CONDITION...(AS OF BACK THEN)..
 
EKG'S....HOLTERS, (TONS OF THEM)...STRESS TEST...PET SCANS...AND NUMEROUS...AND I MEAN NUMEROUS TRIPS TO THE ER...ONLY TO BE TOLD..."DON'T WORRY, YOUR NOT GOING TO DIE FROM THEM"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  OMG...IT'S LIKE DUDES!!  IF YOU COULD ONLY FEEL WHAT HAPPENS ON THE INSIDE OF MY BODY WHEN I GET THEM, YOU'D BE CRAWLING OUT OF YOUR SKIN TOO!...BUT IT'S BEEN THE SAME STORY NOW FOR 25 YRS. :(
 
     THIS BOUT NOW WITH THEM...HAS TURNED ME INTO A FREAK...AGAIN.
 
    I CAN'T STAND TAKING MEDS...AND LIKE MY HOMEOPATHIC DR. SAID TO ME..."WHY DO THEY HAVE YOU ON ALL THESE HEART MEDS WHEN YOUR HEART IS FINE?"..."IT'S THE ELECTRICAL SYSTEM THAT IS MESSED UP...NOT YOUR HEART!"...WOW...SHE GOT ME ON THAT ONE.  THEN SHE ALSO SAID TAKING THE HEART MEDS WAS ONLY GOING TO MAKE MY HEART BECOME DEPENDENT ON THEM, WHICH IN TURN WOULD MAKE MY HEART WEAK...SO GO FIGURE...CUZ IT MADE SENSE TO ME..AND IT STILL DOES.
 
     I HAVE AFFIRMATIONS POSTED ALL OVER THE PLACE.  TWO IN MY MEDICINE CABINET...AND EVERY AM AND PM, WHEN I open IT UP TO GET MY TOOTHBRUSH AND TOOTHPASTE..THERE THEY ARE:  "YOU ARE NOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT GOING TO DIE FROM YOUR PVC'S AND PAC'S.  SMILE...BREATHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE...RELAX...AND BE STRONG.
 
     WELL, IT'S NOT WORKING NOW BECAUSE THEY HAVE BEEN HILACIOUS FOR A MONTH NOW...
 
     AND YES...I'M SCARED crapLESS THAT I'M GOING TO DIE....AND IT ISN'T ANY FUN LIVING IN FEAR OF DEATH ON A MINUTE TO MINUTE BASIS.
 
     IT IS JUST REALLY MIND EASING TO KNOW THAT THERE ARE ALOT OF US WHO SUFFER WITH THESE HORRIFIC THINGS...AND THAT WE ARE ALL STILL HERE.
 
     I JUST WANT TO SAY THANK YOU FOR ALL OF YOU WHO WRITE ON HERE...AND IT'S LIKE I'VE WRITTEN EVERY SINGLE MESSAGE ON HERE MYSELF!!  IT WOULD BE SO GREAT IF WE COULD ALL MEET ONE DAY...AND FIGURE OUT SOME HOME REMEDIES TO END THESE SUCKERS!!
 
     AGAIN...THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR INPUT...YOUR STORIES...YOUR OUTCOMES...AND YOUR FEELLINGS...IT MEANS ALOT TO ME..BECAUSE WITHOUT THESE MESSAGE BOARDS...I REALLY DON'T KNOW IF I'D BE AROUND.
 
     I WILL KEEP YOU POSTED AS TO MY RESULTS FROM THE MONITOR....AND I WILL KEEP YOU ALL IN MY PRAYERS TO THE GODDESS...THAT WE ALL CAN LEARN TO LIVE WITH THEM..EVEN THOUGH I KNOW IT'S WAY EASIER SAID THAN DONE.
 
     BLESSED BE TO ALL OF YOU! 
 
JUDI  X0X0
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