That's no different than the standard here in the States. Nobody is going to do a Nissen on someone whose LES is working properly and does not have a hiatus hernia. If your LES is insufficient but you don't have a hiatus hernia, I'd think you'd still be a candidate. If you have neither of these things, a Nissen WOULDN'T HELP YOU!
When you hear of people who have no relief of their symptoms after the healing stage of the surgery, they very likely had symptoms that were not actually caused by reflux. Therefore the surgery didn't solve their problems, and they went through it all with little or no benefit. (It takes time things to resolve after surgery, and improvements may not be noticable until there is time to heal whatever was being damaged by reflux.)
So bottom line, if you don't have a physical abnormality, why do anything? They'd be CREATING a physical abnormality by performing the surgery.
I really think it's just a communication issue...your surgeon was not saying anything unusual. It's just the way he/she SAID it that created angst. Believe me, I understand your frustration. As my lungs were dangerously unhealthy and I was taking high doses of steroids (that have left me with adrenal insufficiency and skin that bruises and tears extremely easily), my GI doc dragged his feet and refused to take my reflux issues seriously. It's maddening!
Hang in there. It'll all turn out fine...Look at me! I'm breathing easy on a tiny fraction of the steroids I took prior to my surgery. It took time, but eventually we got there. I should have pushed more as well. I was a bit gunshy after reading all the scary posts online. Be your own advocate, but understand that the pace is normally pretty darn slow.
I think that some people rush into surgery and aren't prepared for the changes it creates. Better to go slower and be really ready!