Here I sit after midnight with the "lump in throat" feeling worse then ever. It seemed to ease up for a little while but now it's back with a vengeance. I've been waiting for an endoscopy since May and have two more weeks to wait. I'm afraid that after 10 years of gerd that it's developed into a cancer, even though I know it's rare, this just doesn't feel right and PPI's don't help any longer, although I had a good run with Nexium until the last six months. My chest feels so heavy tonight and I feel as though I could choke even though I know I'm breathing just fine. I've been trying so hard to be hopeful, but tonight I'm feeling hopeless, I guess because this feels so physically horrible. I know the feeling of a flare up, but I've never had one this bad and along with it I have ear ringing and an off balance feeling, even some blurry vision and spacey type feeling, hard to explain. I'm more afraid tonight then I've been in a long long time, I really don't want to face what could be coming, but on the other hand, I want to know what I'm dealing with because sometimes the wondering is worse if that makes any sense.