Gosh Bluedog, it sounds like you are working with some real considerate people. I have all the same asthma triggers as you. I am 56 years old and my asthma came on with a vengeance about five years ago. When I was still working, people were considerate, after they saw me have asthma attacks or saw me go into panic modes trying to find out who had on the perfume before I had an asthma attack. I can't handle scented candles either. I worked at a university and if I smelled a candle that was bothering me, I would just go up and down the hall until I found it. Everyone knew how bad my asthma was and didn't mind to help me. It doesn't sound like the group you work with.
How large of a group of people do you work with? At this point, I wouldn't care if it made them mad, but you need to get your doctor to write out a note, it can even be on a prescription pad, the things that trigger your asthma attacks and that you can not work around these things. The ADA protects people like us, even if they have to put you in a little office all by yourself. I bet that will put a little pressure on boss to talk to the other people about leaving the perfume at home. I also understand your dilemma at church. There will be times when I will sit down and then move a couple of times. It used to embarrass me, but now I just do it and down worry about what people think.
Do you feel like you have GERD symptoms? I know this can trigger asthma, but I think you would feel the reflux. I had my esophagus and a hiatal hernia repaired a couple of years ago because my doctors thought that could be triggering some of my asthma attacks. If you think you have GERD, have you had a thorough work-up by and GI specialist?
My lap Nissen did help my asthma some, but it sure did help the GERD.
I think the medication that helps my asthma most is the Xolair injection that I take every 28 days. I think I have been taking it for about four years. As severe as my asthma is, I have had only one ER visits and no hospital stays. Do you have a nebulizer to use at home? As Char mentioned, I also use Xopenex in my nebulizer. Most asthma patients seem do better if they are treated by an allergist.
Please keep us posted. I'm not a doctor either, just another asthma patient. We are here for you and we care about you.