No problem Lyn . . . you can share with anyone or post it here if you think it might help someone else. . . I would have posted here but wasn't sure if it wasn't too off topic. Also wasn't sure if it might seem a bit cold . . . . but it sure does take the pressure off the executor/executrix. It was a trick we used for settling estates when I worked in a law office and stops most of the gimmy-gimmy and bickering and mainly takes the pressure off the person in charge.
Actually, I just copied it out of the email I sent you and I'll post it here.
One way to distribute the personal items from a deceased loved one:
Each item has a number attached to it (like 1 thru 80 ) Each family member receives a certain amount of "Pretend Estate Cash" . . . like each one has $2,000 to bid on items. They each take a piece of paper and bid on each item they'd like to have (or they can drop slips of paper with there bid in a bowl at each item). That way, each family member can (without squawking) show which items are most dear to them. Initially sounds crass . . . but the more you think about it, it ends the bickering and one person glomming-onto more than his/her share. Limits the hawking (at you) they might do to get certain items too. Kind of a silent auction.
Items left over . . . You could re-issue some more "Estate Cash" and start all over (if things went well the first time around) or each Item Number is put into a hat and each person draws from the hat until all items are claimed. (use a duplicate tag and leave the original number attached to each item). After they receive items from this round, they can then trade among themselves if they don't want items they received.
I hope this helps.