Hello there, peanuts and zubz: I can empathize with what your are going through with your parents. My mother, although not suffering from alzheimer's developed similar symptoms. Hers were also associated with vascular and oxygen deprivation issues. My wife and me were there for her, although the weight of the care and supervision fell on my sister's shoulders, God bless her. Today Sunday March 16th, is the fifth anniversary of my mother's passing away. But I am writing because of my dear wife.
I take my handle (moonstruck) from the fact that on the same occassion when my wife failed her mental test with her neurologist, confirming a dementia diagnosis by the neuropsychologist (soon to be two years ago), the last question asked by the doctor was: Will you write here a sentence for me? I was looking at her with a mixture of anguish and tenderness watching her fail the questions asked from her, seeing in a structured setting the evidence of her diminished mental capacity, once so vibrant and brilliant! And she wrote her sentence and the doctor said: Very good! (He did not share the sentence with me nor did I ask right then and there, maintaining a respectfull distance).
When we went over to pay the medical deductible, her file was open to the page with her answer, and I gently moved it so that I could read what she had written, and there it was: "The moon will come out tonight at 7:00 PM!" I loved her more than ever at that very moment. We had used the moon so many times in a romantic moment or had used it to bring us together at times when we had been temporarily separated.
I have been trying to salvage a much as possible for these last two years of what has been a true love story, before and during the 29 years we have been married - we will celebrate our 29th anniversary on june 27th - and we have faced during the Holidays, begining last December 16th the most serious crisis we have lived through, when she lost control and her hostility was unmanageable and we had to hospitalize her. She had been completely mobile and independent still and the hospitalization, when it ended in January 28th had left her in a wheelchair. She is still fighting to get back her ability to sit in bed by herself, to stand and walk for herself. Her follow up visit with the neurologist and with the expert in physical therapy were positive, she may be able to walk again, but it is going to be an uphill battle.
I decided sometime ago to write alzheimer's without a capital A; I refuse to do her work and she will take my wife away from me inch by inch, millimiter by millimeter...I have a very limited system of support and our daughters have broken my heart at the insensible way they have decided to take to face this tragic illness...I feel abandoned with my ailing wife...and angry. I have been caring for my wife this weekend, alone with her, and although her daughters live a mere 5 minutes away they do not visit nor do they even call to ask how she's doing or to ask if I need to go out (which I did and could not go out neither yesterday or today Sunday). It was upon feeling this anger that I began searching for a support group forum and walked into this site.
Thanks for hearing me out.