Dear Red 34. you've been so helpful and supportive to me in my plight with my farther, I feel the need to try and help you trouble shoot this problem. If her kidneys are shutting down, is she a candidate for dialysis, or is that premature? My stepmother is in a nursing home because her kidneys shut down, she and I were trained in peritoneal dialysis, we tried to manage her at home, then she started having strokes and since I also had to try and care for my father, there was no way I could take care of them both. Plus the house was falling down around us. Now my stepmother has a "cycler" machine which runs all night when she sleeps, it does the job of the kidneys and she has maybe 1/2 cup of urine output daily. This other bag you speak of, could it be wrapped in place with say an elastoplast bandage, and tell her she has a sore (leg, or belly, or whatever) and it has to stay there till it gets better. Or perhaps those back support belts that people use when they have to lift heavy objects, or perhaps a pair of pantyhose (extra large or leggings, maybe in cotton so skin breathes. Or even a pair of old fashioned çombinations (long underwear) For my Gram I found one piece pajammas, because she wouldn't leave her diaper on. I know how much adult diapers cost and feel your pain when you find them torn up or thrown away. I also know the insurance company's are more intent on taking care of their "bottom lines" than of caring for people. Love and lot's of luck, to you. I also cared for both my paternal Grandad (non-alzheimers), and paternal gramma, and she did have alzheimers. I used to get so upset by the way she was handled. It's so very, very hard, this road we're all on. Speedbunps at every turn and when things just begin to seem to stabilize, it seems another, worse, unanticipated, obstacle to our efforts, pops up. Some days I feel like throwing in the towel, but, that's not really an option, is it?