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Sister diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease

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Alzheimer's Disease
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Posted 3/23/2014 1:42 AM (GMT -7)
Hi,
I'm new to this, my sister has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease, recently, they say she is four years in, and it seems like the middle stage. She is 56. She is fighting it and very aggressive about it , if her husband tries to talk to her about it, she doesn't believe that she has it. She has threatened to leave him, if he continues to talk about it. He just wanted to get a companion for her, while he was at work, and asked her was she willing to take the medication, which might help. She has refused everything, it is a very difficult situation, she doesn't know I know her diagnosis, she didn't want anybody to know. She needs help, I don't know where to go from here,

Regards,

Collie

Edit:  I gave your thread a title.

Post Edited By Moderator (stkitt) : 3/23/2014 9:03:20 AM (GMT-6)

Posted 3/23/2014 2:02 PM (GMT -7)
Hello ......

   Denial ......... it's so common!

   My Grandmother had diagnosed alzheimers and died of it over 20-years ago. My Mother just passed two months ago - but at the age of 96 - of Dementia. Even in the last year, she would refuse to believe that she had any kind of a mind destroying disease.

   I'm afraid there may be many heart-breaking years ahead ... without sugar-coating anything. Decisions at times, will need to be made that will likely be aggressively fought by your sister. They are for her own well being - but she will not likely see it that way.

   My suggestion would be to find and then talk to a counselor who specializes in advising families of dementia or alzheimers patients. It would be best to keep the negatives to a minimum ... but again, she may consider any kind of help as a negative.

   This disease is absolutely not fair - in any way! It tends to hurt everyone involved - and eventually hurts the survivors even more. Medication during the earlier stages can be helpful ... and a companion during the day is a great idea.

   See if you can find either a Sociologist or a Psychologist experienced in this disease - for his/her input ... and who might even be able to talk to your sister. If it comes from an authority figure - and a person she does not know, she may take it more seriously. If she gets upset, most of that might be aimed at the stranger rather than a family member.

My best wishes to you.

Rob & Gizmo

 

Posted 3/27/2014 9:41 AM (GMT -7)
Thank you for your great suggestions, it is so hard to believe at the moment, even talking to her, you are wishing it away. It is so hard to contemplate the future for her.
Posted 3/29/2014 3:21 AM (GMT -7)
I have been wondering how aggressive and quickly it goes. My mother in-law is aware that she is at the beginning. So my husband and his siblings are trying to get things straight. She is also a cancer survivor. One year so far ,but she is very frail and we live about 60 minutes away. Just trying to learn from everyone.

I have be on this site for 9 years . Since being diagnosed with End Stage Liver disease, cirrhosis , osteoporosis, degenerative disk disease, fibromyalgia ,knee problems.And who knows what else.
Posted 3/31/2014 11:37 AM (GMT -7)
I also have been wondering how quickly it progresses. My sister is early on set, and some research states that this can progress more quickly. It's hard to think about it, I have to keep in my head, if I go with my emotions, it is too overwhelming to think about the enormity of it, I just feel so sad for my sister but I am trying to do positive things to help her, and to make the most of good quality time we have left
Posted 5/1/2014 6:07 AM (GMT -7)
Hello, I too have a sister that was diagnosed at 59 with Alzheimer's. She is now 64 and well into the disease. It has taken her until recently to accept (if you can call it that) the disease. She flips back and forth from being extremely depressed, crying all the time and being mildly happy (or puts on her game face for us). She is trying to isolate herself now but refusing to go places with us. Sometimes I just show up at her home and that works but not always. I want to help her any way I can. Any suggestions?

Thank you,

Michelle

Posted 5/7/2014 11:13 PM (GMT -7)
Hi Michelle,

I just checked my emails, so apologises for not replying sooner. Yes I can recognise alot of my sister's behaviour in your sister. The consultant says by her scans that she is four years into the disease and she has never talked to us about it. Her husband didn't tell us until recently because she didn't want us to know. That was such a pity because she had stopped ringing us and we will never get back that time, had we known the reason we would'nt have allowed her to isolate herself. Isolation I think, is a killer in this disease, as not having the stimulation progresses it far more rapaidly. Like you I am trying to pop in whenever I can without it being too obvious. I call her regularly now, as she would never call, it's not that she would'nt want to, but she would'nt remember to do it.

My focus now is to give her happy times, as we don't know how fast it will progress. I'm going to be with her as much as I can, and give her good memories. I can't think about the future, we are in the present and that is the only thing we can change. It is overwhelming, and sometines I get really sad and have a little cry and that helps me a little bit I think. My sister is a very different person now, but unfotunately that is the reality and we have to accept it and support her anyway we can. I'd love it to be, not true, to wake up and realize it was just a nightmare, but that's not going to happen.

I hope this helps a little,

take care,

Colette
Posted 5/8/2014 6:26 AM (GMT -7)
Thank you Collette. I appreciate your support. I'll post any new ideas that work and would be glad to hear yours too. They may not work each time but then I'll just try something else.

Thanks again.

Michelle

Posted 5/26/2014 4:11 PM (GMT -7)
I have a strong history of dementia in my family.
Just out of curiosity, what symptoms is your sister displaying and
how do they know that she is four years into the disease?
Having worked in nursing facilities for many years, it does seem like
the early onset AD tends to be more severe.
Thoughts and Prayers.
Mame
Posted 5/28/2014 3:08 PM (GMT -7)
Hello a lainne.

This illness robs everyone of their dignity if not managed with professional help, has been my experience with this disease. It can be increasingly hard on family members and eventually takes a toll.

After the diagnosis all the past questionable behaviors all fall into place.. Not so obvious at first until after the diagnosis. A visiting case worker, or psychologist or a visiting nurse assigned thru state programs & services available thru hospitals in UR area with a doctors referral can be a great help & relief to the family.Sometimes it's best to also find a attorney to that specializes in elder care. Check with ur insurance for coverage available for dementia care.

My father lived with me for many years with dementia. Someone needed to be with him 24/7, especially living out in the country. We did have assistance programs available in our state. He is in a VA facility now at 96 & very Happy. We are lucky to still have him! He is a fearsly independent man.

Educating the whole family on the pros & cons is very important to see the signs of denial & also proper care,exercise, nutrition & meds.

Wonderful advice by all the well thought out comments above.

It will all work out.... giving time for adjustment and organizing what's best for u and UR family. Good Luck

Peace & Light
Posted 6/17/2014 9:41 PM (GMT -7)
Permfindia...

It is against the forum rules for anyone to sell anything on this site.
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