Hello...Let me be blunt and to the point.
My Dad will not listen to doctors, he will not listen to my Mom, he will not raise a finger to help himself, and he won't get out of his chair that sits in front of the TV. He walks like a 1000 year old even though he's 83 and he rarely takes a shower (once every few weeks). He's basically become a lazy jerk who cares very little about
his doting and worried wife or anyone else! But it's all passive/aggressive. He doesn't yell anymore...he just sits there and watches TV looking (and sometimes smelling) like a bum.
I posted once before but I don't really have the time to find the thread and add to it. NO DIAGNOSIS because he hates doctors. No, my Mom doesn't have friends (literally!) to go to for support, only my sister and me. And my sister will be moving out of state next year!! (We both live within 15 minutes of Mom and Dad) Dad is the same. My Mom is beyond tears and this "new behavior" of his which all started after a stay in the hospital now over a year ago. She's VERY afraid and is unfamiliar with the role of being "man of the house". She's very timid but has on occasion gotten really tough with my Dad.
Yes, he forgets things and is lethargic and doesn't give a crap. He wanders when they go to the grocery store. Although a Diabetic, he throws all sorts of sugary sweets into the shopping cart. Prior to the hospital stay he more or less was a "good" Diabetic, now he doesn't care. I could go on and on...and the telemarketers have a FIELD DAY with him!
Personally, I just need to vent on behalf of my Mom. She is an introvert and doesn't know what to do and quite frankly I don't know what can be done with/for him apart from slapping him across the face and yelling "Snap out of it!" Don't get all upset...no one is going to do that.
PLEASE...don't be all politely responsive. Although I appreciate anyone's concern, I need a response that, if nothing else, "mirrors" our frustrations. To put it lightly, it's hard to help someone who won't help themselves... And my Mom is even more distrusting of doctors than my Dad. So what's a daughter to do besides "be there" for them??
HERE'S A BIG QUESTION
At what point, do you just let a person, a stubborn adult, give up????
Post Edited (Diane D.) : 9/11/2014 10:11:48 PM (GMT-6)