Hi Teresa and Welcome ......I am so sorry about
all you are going thru ....recently after looking after my Mom for yrs just myself and daughter (ex as well) my younger sister decided to go to Mom's and paint and take down wallpaper after Mom had been sent home with a mild caes of pneumonia.........well needless to say this made her much sicker she went to hospital and was quite adament she could smell mold and I believed her....anyways to make a long story short My mom was intubated on March 19th ,air lifted to London Ontario and passed away on March 20 at 6:30 in the morning ........there was no POA and the only thing I had done up was a paper (notarized) saying I would never let her go into NH........I was not notified in time to be with Mom when she went I got there after her death and the sister and younger brother with my step dad (also has AD) had been talked to by a social worker and THEY decided to donate Mom's body for research.........
As you can well imagine I was and still am highly upset over all of this and it has really caused some bad feelings amongst the siblings ......They were never there for her when she was alive and I took care of her with all my ilnesses and had my daughter and ex help me ........Dad is the one now we look after and this is her (sister's) Bio dad my step dad BUT again they (none of them) do anything for him unless they want money or something then they are there.......it makes me sick ........so yes I can and do relate to this whole thing you are going thru
I have a suggesstion and I dont know where you live but in Ontario it is allowed.....I have written and had my minister write and other peeps about
the fact that I looked after her and am looking after Dad not any of the other family and I did it out of love not for any other reason or compensation as I am sure you do......to the Lawyer and now I am POA for Dad and I will make sure all is on the up and up anfd follow his wishes to the letter....anyways I have proven that I was the primary caregiver for Mom and Dad and now I am fighting this about
her body being kept in the Hospital (til students return to study) because I will not have her ashes til sometime next yr ..this leaves me no closure and all kinds of heartfelt pain......now I believe that yes AD needs more research but they are doing this this way as it is cheaper and to study alcohol effects ( heavy drinker til last yr) and COPD, Emphysema and she also had cancer ......
Is it possible for you do do as I did and have peeps verify that you and your family were the ones that did her caregivig.....Not the brother......I dont know if this would be possible but I am praying this can be changed for you and you can have her home with you where she will obviously be taken care of and given plenty of love.......I am sorry for the ramble but I am sure you can see that I am still very hurt and angery over all of what had taken place.........If you would like to talk my email and other infois under name please do get ahold of me I am here for you and I am able to understand really....
I am praying for you and your Mom, you's are in my thoughts please get in touch and hey thanks for letting me ramble and get this off my chest........Please keep coming here and posting you will find lots of empathy and support here on HW......God Bless......
BTW if you have the means I would go for the Guardian ship as Snowy had posted about
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