Posted 9/29/2007 8:21 AM (GMT -7)
Again for Lyn, Padraig and Linda,
Last message went through, so I'll try again.
Yesterday was my husband's move to Crofton Manor. I was up late the night before, getting the furniture marked and ready. Two young boys came with a moving van, and I asked them if a cheque was okay, or did they take MasterCard? They said they would rather have cash; that way, I could avoid paying GST. After telling them that I would rather pay the GST, they went upstairs and went on with the job. When it came time to pay, after phoning their boss, they would not accept the cheque for $290.00. I told them that even though I had spoken to their boss three times, this was the first I'd ever heard it had to be cash. I said I had $120.00 cash on hand, and they could have the balance in a cheque. They wanted me to get in their truck; they would drive me to the nearest bank machine, and I could withdraw the money and take a cab home. I told them I had to pick my husband up at the hosptial and wouldn't do it. They drove away in their truck with the furniture. I phoned the cops; they said it was a civil matter.
Picked up husband, arrived at Crofton Manor about an hour later. The truck was there. But now the price had jumped to $390.00. I said to forget about it. They had apparently been badgering the staff at Crofton to pay, because the staff were all VERY UPSET. It seemed the better part of discretion, for future relationships with Crofton, to pay and get the furniture unloaded and the truck off the premises. Which I did. They drove off, keeping one armchair, one footstool, one table and one printer. I phoned the local paper (Courier) that had taken the ad to tell them the business was not reputable; then I phoned a friend of mine who works in the auditing department of the Income Tax Department, telling her that I thought the company was trying to avoid declaring their income for tax purposes.
Backtrack to when I picked up my husband at the first hospital. He didn't want to leave. I had to phone Crofton to assure him that here was room waiting for him. Spent 5 hours with my husband, getting him settled, arrived home wiped out, ready for bed. His son phoned (he must have used another phone because I've blocked his number; this is his 3rd attempt this week - he wants to know when I'm going to move into Crofton). As soon as he said his name and, "I want to check up...." I hung up, pulled the plug on the phone and went to bed.
Fastforward to this afternoon. I arrived at my husband's room at 1:30 p.m. and was trying to hook up a phone for him when in came his ex-wife. Didn't say a word to me but went right over to my husband (of 27 years!) to kiss him. He said, "Would you mind coming back another time to visit? I have a visitor here."
"Maybe tomorrow? Would that be all right with you?
"Oh, yes. All right. How do you like it here, E.?"
"No, of course, you don't. You should be in your own home."
Whereupon I stood up, headed for the door, intending to ask a nurse for help to get rid of ex.
She said, "Mary, what time do you want me to come back tomorrow?"
"It doesn't matter to me, but E. has asked you to leave now. He doesn't want to have more than one visitor at a time."
"Well, I can come back tomorrow. What time would be all right with you?"
"I don't care. But I want you to go now, as E. has already asked."
Door closes behind her. One minute later, a knock. it's Nancy, a neighbour, goes to the same church and had helped me take care of Eric when he was home. I almost fell into her arms at seeing a friendly face. We all sat and chatted for about 10 minutes.. Knock on the door. I went. It was E.s' son. I said, "Would you mind waiting outside for about 10 minutes?" He said, "I want to talk to you, Mary." I said, "I have nothing to say to you" and closed the door. Went back to sit with Nancy and E. Put on the call light for the nurse.
Few minutes later, very loud knocking. I started to get up. Eric told me that he would handle it. From what I could hear from the open door, he told the son that the family was putting pressure on Mary, and he wanted it stopped. Son put up a defense. E. said,
"Maybe not you, but the rest of the family are, and Mary feels it as pressure." The gist was that it was soft pedaling on E.'s part but with enough firmness to get the message across. Son went away, although I learned later that he went to talk to the nursing manager about it.
Nurse came about 10 minutes later.
I went to the nursing manager before I left to say that this was upsetting to E., to be told he should be at home. The nursing manager said he would check in on E. whenever the family visited.
Told mu husband that I would not be visiting him tomorrow before checking with him by phone to see if ex-wife and son and come and gone. May skip it altogether, though. I'm fair frazzled. I'm planning to go to teh Sunshine Coast next Wednesday after class for about 5 days.
Love to you all,