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Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 491
   Posted 2/13/2008 6:10 PM (GMT -6)   
do you ever feel like you can't ever truly relax, like me i have trouble enjoying things , like to just slow down, i always feel i have to be on top of things so everyone else is happy, i guess its part of being a mom, but its hard to sit still through a movie, playing a game, or going on a trip, or anything i guess its part of anxiety, i know my dad is like that, and i think he made me like that, i hope i don't pass it on, my husband is the complete opposite . he can just relax anywhere, me going to strange place i'm a mess, one place i really enjoyed was we went on a quartz dig in Arkansas and i was so relaxed i love digging for them, i think i should have been a archaeologist , it really relaxes me,


Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 2/13/2008 7:00 PM (GMT -6)   


I can empathise with that one let me tell you!! No matter how hard a day I have had I still have to cook for everyone, do the dishes, mop the floor, invent a new language!! I think, sadly, it's the nature of our anxiety.  If I sit still for too long then I get wound up and feel guilty, then upset and then anxious (my mother says I have been like this since I was teeny tiny).

I get jealous of my guy, he too can just chill out and lie around at the beach or whatever relaxing.  I find one thing that helps is to put aside a "guilt free" hour or two where I sit down have a hot choc and watch something silly on teev, or's MY time to not have the guilts...having said that it's hard isn't it? Wish I could relax too.  Have you ever thought about doing something like archeology as a hobby, if it relaxes you it might be a great place to start


I alone can do this, but I cannot do it alone. 

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 491
   Posted 2/13/2008 8:08 PM (GMT -6)   
they have people they go around the country on digs for different type stones , i also have went on a dig for arrowheads that was fun, found pottery and arrowheads, i need to look into it more, i know to be a archaeologist it takes several years of school and money for that i don't have, :-)

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2008
Total Posts : 505
   Posted 2/13/2008 10:52 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Machelle! I too find it hard to just relax! I'm always cleaning,washing clothes,or doing things to try to make my husband happy. And make everyone else happy too, except myself. I'm always putting other people feelings before mine! I always feel like i have to waite on people hand and foot. I have been like that for so long i dont no any other way to be! People like my mom and mother-in-law are always getting on to me for being like that and when they're around they refuse to let me get anything for them! Or my husband!(lol) They always say things like,"will you please sit down!" Even my husband say that sometimes! He say,"do you even know how to sit down!" Honestly sometimes i dont believe i do! I think I'm just naturally a care taker and i really do enjoy taking care of people.But i also notice it's rare that people return the favor.But you know its good to relax sometimes.You and i both need to make a promise to each other that we are going to try to relax more! You too Meg! (lol)

Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 393
   Posted 2/14/2008 3:51 AM (GMT -6)   
Hey Machelle, I find it hard to really relax too, jus always feel i have to be doing something constructive. gudluck wiv the archealogy lol.

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 2/14/2008 8:49 AM (GMT -6)   
I am definitely NOT a relaed person at all
I am on the go all the time cleaning cooking driving ect ect the OCD ya know
getting better but I am still not ther yet
I do try to read a bit at night but am so exhzustyed by the time head hits pillow......and I am reclined back that it is lights out for a cat nap again and again

Kudos on the archealogy sounds like alot of fun and you do sound passionate about it

LYN........GREAT thread IMHO
  DX With Crohns,Pyoderma Gangrenosum, Anxiety/ Panic and Other Disorders
         Mod for Alzheimer's, Anxiety and Panic and Co Mod for Crohns Donate today to keep HW helping others

Elite Member

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 2/14/2008 9:57 AM (GMT -6)   

Good Morning and I run on high octane much of the time..........
what works for me is sitting in the sun by water...............maybe a cafe mocha to sip on.
Music, I love music so sometimes I let the music take me away.

Happy Valentines Day

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic  ~ Crohn's
*~* *~*
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~

Veteran Member

Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 778
   Posted 2/14/2008 11:18 AM (GMT -6)   
You know, as I am getting more life experience(ok, ok, approaching 40!) I realize that I am but one person. I cannot make everyone happy nor is it my job. I can only do what is humanly possible.
There are days when you triage according to 0 to 10.
0 = Not even remotely important and can wait for awhile
10= Must do immedieately(go to ER, Put kitchen fire out, pull 2 year old neices toungue out of electrical socket...

Do what the military and Emerg rooms do: TRIAGE
It will make you relaxed just knowing it. You can even write the list down and # each by priority.
Dishes wont die in the sink. The groceries are important if you like to eat.
Get it? :) :)
I am a Certified Doxie Lover(Weinerdogs)

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 491
   Posted 2/14/2008 11:55 AM (GMT -6)   
i feel most of the time like well your a mom and a wife so its your job, it is, but sometimes it would be nice to be waited on, cared for when sick, if i have a stomach virus or the flu, its like when are you going to cook supper, sometimes my husband does, but when i am sick i am still in charge of the fort, it makes you wonder what would they do if you went on strike, just so they realize how important you really are, i wonder sometimes if anxiety is mostly a mom are wife disease, you care for people all your life and never yourself until one day your body says hey what about me , its not that i don't like being a mom are wife its just the lack of respect you get sometimes, example husband comes homes takes off nomex from work throws on floor, and his socks its like servant come do you you job. i need to learn me time i think we all do, maybe one day in our wildest dreams we might actually get a thank you for what we do.
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