Hi Nyliz: I am so sorry for everything that you are going through right now. It sounds like you are both physically and emotionally tired and really do deserve to have some good cries to get it out of you. I have also gone through many periods of time where I have found myself crying over everything, not wanting to get out of bed, and worrying about how I am effecting my two daughters. Usually I go through this when I am overwhelmed with so many responsibilities, have not been feeling well or am just emotionally exhausted. It is a vicious cycle that is very hard to stop once it starts. But despite this you need to realize that it can and will stop. Think about setting one or two tiny goals for yourself each day. Think of some small tasks to do and ignore all the rest. Take your time to build up your strength. This can be quite difficult to do but you will eventually start to feel some small satisfactions - which are positive building steps. Yes, your children may see that life is difficult for you at the moment, but they will also see Mom not giving up. You will be starting small but you will be starting and I think that in itself is a really good thing to see. Mom not giving up - this will help all of you start to feel a little better.
Don't be too hard on yourself right now. If you had a broken leg you would be in a lot of pain and start very slowly. Your emotions are just as important and should be addressed in the same caring manner. And in regards to your physical fears, just take one step at a time. Remember when we don't feel well we always think and fear the worst. Its a good thing you are working with the doctor. Let him address your fears and concerns for you.
I'll say some prayers for you tonight. Just hang in there because you can and will start feeling better. We have all been where you are now. Please feel free to post anytime because everybody here cares and truly can empathize with all your thoughts and fears.