Post Edited By Moderator (Howlyncat) : 4/11/2008 9:04:11 AM (GMT-6)
HI JT Cage,
Welcome to the Healing Well Forum; this is a very caring and supportive group and we consider ourselves to be a little family. We are very happy that you have joined us and hope you stick with us.
I am so sorry that you are going through all of this, it's got to be very difficult for you. Anxiety and panic can be hard to deal with and it can sneak up on you at any time for any reason it chooses. It's like it has a mind of it's own. But we can beat it little by little it we work with it; as you have already been told by your family and friends seeing a therapist is a good thing. It's not admitting you're crazy, it's just admitting that you have a problem and are seeking help to find ways to deal with it. Although the a/p may never completely go away, you can find ways/strategies to help you cope. Have you talked with your physician about any of this? Have you considered taking meds to help with the anxiety? Taking meds also would not be admitting that you are crazy or a failure in any way, it's just a way to help until you can get through this difficult time. There are many good meds available, but you are the one who makes that final decision; if you do see a doctor about this make sure to ask lots of questions about any meds suggested so that you can make an informed decision. You need to advocate for yourself because you know your body better than anyone else. We can help you in many ways, but we cannot give medical advice except to say that we recommend you see a doctor. There are lots of members (myself included) here who see therapist and psychiatrists as well as take meds. Remember, doing these things is NOT an admission of being crazy - just that you have a problem that you want help with and to find ways to cope with it.
A/P is hard to deal with, especially if you try to do it yourself. Why not help yourself a little bit by talking to your doctor. You are stronger than you think you are - you have been able to deal with your mom's death and that's not easy. It was good that you took today off so that you can "re-group" and get yourself together; we all need to do that from time to time.
I also strongly suggest that you NOT drink or do drugs of any kind; it seems to me that some of your episodes coincide with your attacks - maybe it's helping to bring them on when you are already stressed.
Please keep posting to let us know how are you doing and so that we can get to know you even better. We will be here to help you through this difficult time.
Take care and lots of (((((hugs))))) coming your way,
Co-Moderator Anxiety/Panic Disorders
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I am in no way a medical professional, any advice given is purely on an amateur level.
Please seek professional advice from your doctor.
Dx: Agoraphobia, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Barrett's Esophagus, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Essential Tremors, Fibromyalgia, I.B.S., Mitral Valve Prolapse, Narcolepsy, PTSD, Restless Leg Syndrome, Acid Reflux, Sleep Apnea
Rx: Abilify, Flexeril, Lamictal, Neurontin, Nexium, Requip, Ritalin LA, Rozerem, Valium
“People have two ears and one mouth for a reason; you need to listen twice as much as you talk.”
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Good Morning JT and welcome to HealingWell and the A & P forum. I am so happy you found us and I hope that we can give you the support you need.
I am so sorry about the death of your Mom. I have lost many so I understand loss and I am feeling it may be a good idea you go to grief counseling or join a bereavemnt group so you can talk with others that have lost a loved one. Just a thought. :)
Each person grives in their own way and there is no right or wrong way to do it. I lost a son at the age of 21 and I grieve for him in my own way. No one can just write one book and say this is how it works and when your done reading the book all will be ok. You do it your way and if you want to talk about your Mom and others are uncomfortable, talk to us.We are here and we will listen. I would be very cautious with the alcohol as it is a depressant.
Sometimes if your already feeling anxious alcohol can kick in other feelings.
Again welcome to our family and please stay with us. We are here 24/7.Gentle Hugs
Post Edited (deedah) : 4/10/2008 6:06:37 PM (GMT-6)
Hello JT! I too just found this website about a week ago. It has helped me a lot to hear other peoples stories that are so similar to mine. I have one friend that I can talk to that goes through this so it's amazing to see how many people really have the same problems as I do. I have not seen a therapist but I did recently get on meds which have helped out a lot! I don't know what I would do if I lost my mother but I have lost a lot of people close to me and it's never easy especially when you have a panic disorder. I will also be turning 27 in August and my husband is always telling me I am having a midlife crisis at a very young age! I feel crazy most of the time. I hope you feel better soon. Let us know how things work out for you!!
Thanks for sharing,
Hang in there!
From what I've learned about anxiety and panic attacks, your questions are very natural. "Am I going crazy? Is this a heart attack? Am I about to die?" It seems to me that different people encounter different issues/questions out of this kind of list, because everybody's situation is a little different, but the common thread is always a fear of something unbearable happening.
All you can do at a time like that (in the middle of an attack) is just try to calm your energies. A lot of people use deep breathing exercises, or some sort of visualization to try to get hold of that little bit of solidity that's still hiding underneath somewhere. I had some success with breathing techniques for all but my worst attacks. You may be able to find out more about that and other relaxation/calming techniques through the resources on the forum. They may not be a cure - at least, they aren't for me -- but they might help you to get through an attack with less distress.
Another thing my therapist has pointed out to me is that the "what if?" types of questions can provoke anxiety. I've not gotten very good at recognizing my own "what ifs?" and certainly not soon enough to shut them down before an attack starts. Maybe other folks can say more about this.
It's too bad that your insurance doesn't cover mental health, but you may be able to locate some inexpensive options where you are. Sometimes, there are programs where you pay based on what you are able to, not a flat rate for all.
And count me among those who think you deserve to grieve in your own way and at your own speed. It doesn't matter whether you're grieving for your mom early, late, or in the middle. Your grief process is your own, and it's okay to let it unfold in the ways that you're able to. Don't worry about whether anybody else thinks you're doing it "right" or not, because it's your grief, your loss, and your mother, not theirs.
Hold on, JT. We're here with you.
I am glad you went to see your stepdad and had a good talk but the grief and the anxiety won't just disappear with one good visit.
I have been through times in my life where I have felt like I lost part of my life too but try to stay in the moment. The past is over, nothing stays the same and you will be blessed with many wonderful experiences in this life. Some will be good, really good, others not so good but that is the road of life.
It is like reading a book, you do not know what is in the future or how the book ends but you continue to read it because it is riveting.
Each person makes choices in their lives, and yes hindsight is always 20:20 but take your time. Write down all the things you want to do in this life no matter how unattainable it may seem.............just write, have fun with it. Now let your list be for a few days and then look at it and see which items jump out at you as something you really want to do.
I also agree with all who suggest you see a therapist to help you through this rough time. You have a lot of living to do and we are here to help you get back on the road.