Thank you all for your replies, it does help to share and get some support here! I am feeling better about everything, not as nervous about having a hole in my tooth, not that I like it mind you, just doesn't scare me. I've been on antibiotics for 6 days now and am just realizing how sick I was before. Of course I didn't relate how I was feeling to my tooth, just thought it was stress, but I was exhausted and had a headache every day and just no energy or desire to do anything...just felt yucky. Each day I've noticed how much better I feel and it makes me realize that it was a very good thing that I went into the dentist when I did!
angel, thank you for sharing your experience with root canal, knowing that it is normal to have it left open really did ease my mind.
percy, what you said about my having the infection before and it didn't hurt me is so true, and a perspective I hadn't thought of, it gave me a bit of calm to think of it that way.
kitt, thankfully it didn't hurt a bit, it felt a little funny, kind of like when I used to get my braces tightened, but no pain to speak of. My lip, jaw and chin feel kind of different now, but I'm thinking it's because the infection was causing some swelling and now that that is gone, it just feels different than it did last week. I'm the same way about dentists...hate to go, and I wish I could use the nitrous, but it increases my anxiety instead of relaxing me. I just walk in and let the assistant and the dentist know that I have panic disorder and that this is very hard for me. All of them were amazing, it helped me to know that they knew, and they treated me with such over the top kidness and caring because of it.
meg, I'm trying to just go with the flow right now and let the appts happen as they will, and I'd be glad to hold your hand anytime you need a friend!
leah, thank you for the boost. I really hadn't thought too much about how well I had done since I was so deep in the fear of it all, but I did do an amazing job considering the circumstances.
I've talked to my in-laws and they have gladly agreed to take me to any and all of my appts., they are really great people who have a decent understanding of what I go through. It won't be as easy as if my husband was there, but I'll manage. Thank you all soooo much, everything you said was just what I needed to get myself back on track. You are all wonderful people and I feel so fortunate to be a part of this group!