Well, i just have to say that i dont know what to do anymore, ive been struggling with my anxiety pretty badly in the last few months to the extreme, so much suffering.
But to top it off the most is the fact that im going through all this stuff with my sons father we arent together because he was abusive in every way.. i left him for a better life for me and my son and now he is making our life hell well has for ages now, but i always got through it its been so tuff but i made myself look at the bright side to absoulutly everything and i made myself believe that my son would be ok with this man but he is still the same and he just keeps proving it and i hate it bcoz i took so much time making myself believe it bcoz without that it is too depressing and too painfull to know that i have no control over the fact that he wants to be in my sons life, us anxiety people are sensitive and more caring types and im just really struggling with this because how can i make myself keep believeing when he keeps proving he is still abusive.
hes taking me to court and thats all that seems to happen these days in and out of court i dont have the time to do all this crap im a single mum with health issues that need to be sorted out first and now this gets in teh way and i cant even do whats best for me first coz i dont have the time.
The feeling of having to hand over ur child to someone so nasty so cold so abusive when ur child is the best thing in ur life, ur world and my child is sensitive too he is a caring loving soul it pains me that he has to be involved with this man. How am i suppose to deal with it i have no control over it. Im meant to put up with these unbearable feelings for the next 16 years i cant do it i wont. id die its too much too take. i dont know what to do anymore.
Me and my son are so happy together and this horrible man is making my life hell. i feel like im stuck and i need a way out but cant find one so i cant breathe i hate feeling like this and it never ends. i dont have time to get help or anything. i dont have any friends to talk to and im sick of talking to a computer. i fear i will feel like this untill my son is 18 i cant wait that long, this isnt the life i want, what if i cant cope anymore. its too long to feel this way. i want to go bak overseas but i dont want to get in trouble with the law by taking my son but im only doing it too protect him. what should i do.
Post Edited By Moderator (stkitt) : 8/4/2008 10:49:42 PM (GMT-6)