You guys are the best! i SO knew i could count on you for support! Kitt- i drank some cold water and before i knew it, family had arrived and i was ok. i also took my Xanax earlier than i normally do and that helped. I also did my breathing exercises religiously, they are the most sure fire way to calm the crazy in me. I ALWAYS, no matter where i am, since i was diagnosed at 14, sit at the end of the table so i dont feel trapped, and can get up and leave without any fuss if i need to, but the nerves settled down- and i enjoyed myself. i also didnt eat too much because i tend to panic if i stuff myself, i find it harder to breathe and sit there thinking about vomiting, so i eat cautiously, but i enjoy myself. (trust me- with my 'Zoloft weight' as i refer to it, i can afford to eat carefully!)
why does this happen when you least expect it? (i know the answer- there is NO rhyme or reason with A/P, it has its own twisted sense of timing) it just jumped at me out of the blue and that old, unwanted yet highly familiar feeling set in and so did the dread that accompanies it. i said a prayer, a very long prayer and began slowing my breathing and focusing on the fact that anxiety will NOT hurt me, i simply wont let it, when i realised i wanted to go straight to HW and to my HW family and share with them cos i KNOW they are superstars who understand and would know what to say- and i was right!
Ben, Junebug- thankyou for your kind words and thoughts- helped more than you know. Kitt- you are super sweet and so practical, your advice never fails and i just thank you, you are such a gem and your words make a huge difference. you are so amazingly supportive and in tune with the needs of others. im so very grateful to have come to know you. your optimism is contagious! XX Mary: precious Mary, you made me laugh so much! you had better put your teeth back in, i have leftovers and mum made the most amazing Raspberry, White Chocolate and Macadamia Torte which is a slice of heaven. oh i wish i had super stretchy arms to send some your way. how bout i have it for you?
Thankyou everyone for letting me collapse here and say 'im struggling' without fear of judgement. There is power in community and we have the power here. XX
'He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.' (Psalm 147:3)
CFS, Fibro, TMJ disorder, Endometriosis, Polycystic Ovaries, Chronic ear/nose/throat infections, Panic Disorder, Reactive Arthritis, Agoraphobia, Sinusitis, IBS, Tachycardia, Allergies, Insomnia, Chemical/Noise/Light sensitivity, Trichotilomania, Seasonal Mood Disorder, Mild OCD.
Meds: Zoloft 150mg. Xanax 4mg. Celebrex. Mobic. Panadeine Forte. Digesic. Phenergan. Benadryl. Stemetil.
Multiple surgeries- I bear the scars of my poor physical health.
Age:28. First diagnosed at 14. Proud Aussie.