HI BEN......thx for your reply. It was great talking to someone who truly seems to understand what we go through and I am soooo glad I found this site. What is CAT therapy? I start a session of CBT therapy this next Tuesday. I hope it goes better than when I did it years ago....not much came out of it for me. The breathing techniques she taught me were useful when I have the time, but my work is fast paced and a lot of customer oriented, so what am I supposed to say, "Excuse me a moment, but I will be right back, I have to do my breathing techniques?" ! That is why the Paxil helped so much more.....just went along with my day and no panic attacks until they started this fall.
I am now trying Luvox, my therapist seems to think I have some Social anxiety thrown in with a little OCD as well. It has been 2 wks I have been on the Luvox, have not noticed too much change yet, in fact my Xanax is still saving me, but is short-lived. I try not to take too much of it because of the additive qualities. I am waiting for the Luvox to kick in, maybe it never will and I will have to move on to another. I hope not....the thought of trying all these different meds is not my idea of fun, but I guess i will do whatever I have to to get my life back!!
I am so disappointed that on Sept 26, I was in an airport waiting to take a flight to Las Vegas (by myself) had never had trouble before, and actually enjoy flying......not my favorite thing, but don't mind it, it gets me to where I need to go. A year and a half ago took the first trip by myself and did great.....except in the airport when we landed I had a little anxiety because i didn;t know where to go at first but found a friend from the flight and we walked together. Since then, made two more trips to Vegas (I have close relatives living there with new babies) with my one cousin, one trip was hairier than the other, but I made it OK, usually its the stress of the airport that gets me, not the actual flight!! Well on this past Sept 26, had a major panic attack sitting waiting to go thru security......sweating, shaking, dizzy, disoriented, the whole major thing,,,hyperventilating, and that is what it has been like since. I did not go on the flight, had to have my relative pick me up, and was sooooo disappointed!!That was a major step BACK for me, and now I am sort of depressed about it.....not to the point of suicide or anything, but just feel bad that I took the step back and I couldn't seem to help it! Even some people I knew were on the same plane and tried to encourage me, but I think they thought I was AFRAID to FLY which wasn't the case.....it was all the terrible symptoms and thoughts that did me in! The Paxil poop out thing.....
I was so embarrassed, a man came up to me and told me flying is nothing......he of course thought I was afraid as well, which I explained I wasn;t, have taken the same flight 3 times before and no problem!! He just couldn't get it either....
So since then I have been off work, I have 4 more wks off work before I try to go back and am scared.......afraid I might not get meds that work, I need my job because I need the money, have worked at the same business for over 20 yrs and not told too many people of my condition, too embarrassing!! A few do know, and I think a couple might suspect....but not for sure. I just want to get back to work, healthy and happy, last yr I even attended a prayer group about this in Las Vegas when I was there, and prayed really hard to get through all this, but it wasn't as bad then as it is right now!
I have a very sensitive personality, am a perfectionist, and they say that the personality type like that tends to get these disorders.....I do remember in Jr High washing my hands a lot, but not knowing it was OCD then, in the late 1960s things like that were unknown......but as I look back, those traits were there, the repeating of things, counting(I do mostly in 3's) and I am very superstitious about certain days of the week and that something i do might cause harm to others! I know it is irrational, I know that, although I have been a lot better with those feelings as I have gotten older.
Sooo.....if anyone else wants to post a reply please do....anyone on Luvox and had any experiences with it? I would love to hear if it works (PLEASE! I hope so!).......otherwise will check in later and let you know how I am doing! THANKS BEN!!!! and
Thanks so much everyone!