i really do believe there is merit in 'tough love', not to be confused with nastiness or a lack of caring. Its important to encourage people to face their fears and for us to be there for them, but we cant indulge in enabling behaviour
or advice. some times people post and the advice they need may not be the advice they want, but thats too bad. we are here to support and uplift each other, and yes, at times we can wallow, but there are members out there, like in real life, who dont necessarily take a mature approach to their personal journey/recovery.
Im all for no nonsense 'call a spade a spade', but this cant be done in a rude, cold or abrupt manner- all advice should be given from a place of kindness and i think thats what Cowboy and Kitt are referring to.
sometimes the most practical advice isnt wrapped up snuggly in a warm way- i think its very important that no matter the advice you give, its always done in a kind, respectful and empathetic manner.
Thats my 2 cents- i have been guilty of having a pity party at times, but at the same time, i needed that, and people on this forum were really supportive and understanding (re my physical health being very poor at the moment)-
All the best,
p.s i understand that people need to vent/wallow/be upset etc and i dont deny them comfort or support, but what i cannot deal with is people who refuse to accept advice and take responibility for their illness, people who make no real effort to help themselves. thats when a bit of 'tough love' is necessary in my opinion. enabling comments and platitudes will not assist in the healing process-
'He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.' (Psalm 147:3)
Panic Disorder, Agoraphobia, CFS, Fibromyalgia, TMJ disorder, Endometriosis, PCOS, Chronic E.N.T infections, Reactive Arthritis, GERD, Sinusitis, IBS, Allergies, Glandular fever, Migraines, Anemia, Chemical/Noise/Light sensitivity, Trichotilomania, PTSD, Seasonal Mood Disorder, OCD, Benign Vertigo, Impaired immune system. Tachycardia, tinnitus, low clotting factor= bruising. Tendonitis, Bursitis.
Meds: Zoloft 150mg. Xanax 4mg. Celebrex. Mobic. Panadeine Forte. Digesic. Nexium.
Multiple surgeries- I bear the scars of my poor physical health.
Age:28. First diagnosed at 14. Proud Aussie.
Post Edited (Mazfire) : 1/1/2009 11:32:51 PM (GMT-7)