Try not to beat yourself up Ben- you said it yourself, your drinking is a problem- with alcohol being a depressant you arent going to have a feeling of balance and peace while its in your system. You need to get to the root of WHY you drink- especially when you know how bad it is when mixed with meds. I think its time to see your Pdoc and get something happening, cos you cant keep living the cycle of panic and alcohol, there has to be another way to deal with those anxious feelings. you have not let any of us down, we are here for you always.
take care and hang in there, yeah?
p.s im 28, all my friends are married or similar and im single and i envy their happiness and companionship quite often, i understand that.
'He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.' (Psalm 147:3)
Panic Disorder, Agoraphobia, CFS, Fibromyalgia, Chronic Sinusitis, TMJ disorder, Endometriosis, PCOS, Chronic E.N.T and Upper respiratory tract infections, Reactive Arthritis, GERD, IBS, Glandular fever, Migraines, Anemia, Chemical/Noise/Light sensitivity, Trichotilomania, PTSD, Seasonal Mood Disorder, OCD, Benign Vertigo, Impaired immune system. Tachycardia, tinnitus, low clotting factor= bruising. Tendonitis, Bursitis.
Meds: Zoloft 150mg. Xanax 4mg. Celebrex. Mobic. Panadeine Forte. Digesic. Nexium.
Multiple surgeries- I bear the scars of my poor physical health.
Age:28. First diagnosed at 14. Proud Aussie.