We've had several threads about obsessive thoughts, and how hard it is for some of us to just let go of thoughts and ideas that spin round and round and won't settle down.
Since I got blindsided at work today by a colleague's very underhanded sniping in a division meeting, I'm thinking over and over about the episode, my reaction, and what I should have done. Thanks to my wonderful hubby-to-be, I've been able to settle down already and accept that wow!, maybe I handled that really, really well.
But I know that I obsess about conflict a *LOT*. When there's a problem with someone, I can't let go of thinking about what it meants, how I reacted, should I have done something different, trying to plan ahead, I guess, so that I don't feel thrown out of control the next time.
Anyhow, sorry for the long lead-in, but I thought this might be a good question:
How do you deal with the "Did I handle that right?" obsession (or just fear of conflict)?
I'm afraid my best answer right now is: I got lucky and managed to do something I feel satisfied about. Let me dwell on being proud of getting through it well instead of beating myself up. Also, if I did okay this time, I guess I have some skills I didn't recognize; I'll try to trust that they'll be there next time I need them too.
Co-Moderator, Anxiety and Panic Forum