Welcome, Laney. I'm glad you've found us.
I can identify with your fears in some ways. Years ago, I was sitting in the public library, and started to notice a little tickling or brushing against my behind. Thinking I'd imagined it, I went back to reading. Slowly, I realized that it was some creep sitting behind me getting his jollies by pestering strange women with a pencil. I thrust back my chair very suddenly and made a big to-do of leaving.
That kind of nasty surprise seems to trigger other anxieties for some of us. For me, it was days of obsessing about
how I should have reacted. For you, it's fearing a sneak attack of HIV. Either way, that's our anxiety using the "shock" and off-balance experience to get past our defenses. I agree with other posters that if you didn't feel a prick or notice any wounds, you should be quite safe. Of course, you can always get a test when the timing is appropriate, but be careful that you don't let yourself obsess over this event for very long.
Since you're prone to anxiety, it certainly will take every chance it gets to push on your boundaries, and this sounds like a prime example of it. Try to relax, accept that you're upset by the event, and tell yourself it's perfectly okay to just be upset and agitated without a more detailed "target." Breathe deeply, and remind yourself that you did respond in a very firm and clear way by smashing his hand (Bravo!). You acted in a smart way, and that's something to feel positive about
in this situation.
Co-Moderator, Anxiety and Panic Forum