Hang in there. You're wise to make the appointment, and you'll make it through. It's very smart to tell him everything, so that he can do his best to help you. I'm glad you've got a comfortable relationship with him; that helps, even though you might not feel it right now.
You sound like the idea of meds makes sense to you, but that you're just scared to take them. Think about
the camping trip, and how much more comfortable it could be if you've adjusted to some helpful meds. I can identify with worrying about
being out in the middle of nowhere; maybe a fast-acting med can help you deal with that.
Is there something you enjoy doing that you could use as a treat after finishing your visit? Something that will help you settle down or congratulate yourself for going? Maybe you want to soak in a nice hot bath, or maybe a special meal or movie sounds appealing. Try following up the visit with something pleasant to see if that helps you associate good things with going to the doctor instead of only bad things.
Good luck to you, and let us know how the appointment goes for you,
Co-Moderator, Anxiety and Panic Forum
DX: Anxiety, Depression, LPR (acid reflux)
Meds: Paxil, Nexium, Zantac