I felt much the same way you are when I turned 30. My former mother in law help me to see that I was mourning the passing of what had occurred in my 20's. I had had married, had my children, all the things you usually look to do in that time (in the late 70's & 80's).
Many are frightened when they go into a new age group. But let me tell you, you are heading into some of the best years of your life. It seems as if some of lifes worries are a little easier at this time of life. At least I feel that way.
Sounds like your anxiety is ramping up alot right now. Try to stay in the here and now, and not worry about the what if's. Take slow, deep breathes and try to relax. The coughing, wierd heartbeats are all part of anxiety. Do you have any fast acting meds you might take to help calm you, if you do I suggest taking them now. Sending healing thoughts and prayers your way.
Gail*Nanners* Co-Moderator for Crohns Disease and Anxiety/Panic Forum
Crohn's Disease for over 33 years. Currently on Asacol, Prilosec, Estrace, Prinivil, Diltiazem, Percoset prn for pain, Zofran, Phenergan, Probiotics, Calcium w/Vit D, and Xanax as needed. Resections in 2002 and 2005. Also diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, Osteoarthritis, and Anxiety. Currently my Crohns is in remission, but my joints are going crazy!
It's scary when you start making the same noises As your coffee maker.
*Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle of faith"*