I didn't take offense. I'm just frustrated that things are the way they are. I could afford to go to the doctor, but you know it's a crapshoot if you can find a doctor with any degree of understanding about anxiety. Going is a gamble, and it's an expensive one. And you know how I feel about upping the dose on a benzo. Adding one would be similar. I kind of think the Klonopin I do take will keep this from getting really, really bad. Perhaps yesterday was just a bad day.
Other than "chemical intervention" as you put it, I was wondering what people do when their anxiety gets out of control and sticks around that way for a long period of time. There has to be something...mind you I'm not asking how to eradicate anxiety that gets that bad. I'm asking how someone copes with it and maybe gets it to a point that is manageable. Usually I'm pretty good at heading it off as it's starting up, but if there's no warning that's hard to do. What I ultimately did yesterday was eat a bunch of sugar. It was a shot in the dark and I don't recommend it. What it did was create the sugar high which in a state of anxiety is absolutely horrible to deal with, but when that high went away and my energy level troughed, my anxiety finally eased. I'd like to go the rest of my life without having to use that "method" again. Awful experience.
Anyway, back to the frustration...I think that's what probably caused the whole thing. I mean we have this recession. I barely held on and was almost out of business several times during the worst of it. But I worked my fingers to the nub staying afloat and eventually it paid off. Three months in a row things were so good I recovered a lot of the loss that I incurred this year. But then the state made all these crazy regulations that affect my business, and this has my clients freaked out and suddenly they don't want to move on anything. Eventually I think these regs will actually be good for my business, but until people are used to this things are going to be very lean. I'm not big on things having to be "fair". Life isn't fair and all of us here in this forum certainly know that. So I will say that it is frustrating and leave it there. Well enough of the venting. I should be very thankful that my hard work paid off for a time, because otherwise I don't know where I'd be right now. Instead I think I can weather this...I just don't like the idea of feeling broke again. The after tax income swings have been absolutely insane. Nearly triple digits one year. Flat the next. I don't even want to say how much I lost during the first two quarters this year, but it looks like when FY2009 is all accounted for it will have seen negative income, though it was erratic all year. Again, enough of the venting.
Maybe there's not an answer but what I'm looking for are ways to back myself down from really intense anxiety...anxiety that resembles a near constant panic attack that goes on for hours. Any advice that doesn't cost me money would be greatly, greatly appreciated.
Thanks for listening.