Good Morning and welcome to HealingWell.
Thank you for sharing your story and please know you made a wise decision in reaching out for help here in the A & P Forum.
It feels to me like you have anticipatory anxiety as this is exactly what I experience.
Anticipatory anxiety is where a person experiences increased levels of anxiety by thinking about
an event or situation in the future. The worries you experience specifically focus on what you think might happen, often with catastrophic predictions about
To begin treating anticipatory anxiety, we must be able to admit that we cannot predict the future. Any scenario we are able to imagine is nothing more than speculation and fabrication.
Picturing positive outcomes can significantly reduce apprehension, which can lead to increased levels of confidence and an overall elevation in mood.
When you find yourself wondering, "What if..." Stop! Take a deep breath; breathe in through the nose, hold the air in your lungs for a count of four, then slowly let the air out through the mouth. While you are doing this, consider the possibility that you are being unrealistic and irrational. Focus on positive or neutral outcomes.
I hope this helps you to stop the anxiety in it's tracks and that you will recieve some good advice and a treatment plan when you see your physician.