More than I can deal with

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Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 151
   Posted 2/17/2010 11:57 AM (GMT -7)   
Haven't posted in a while, not like life has been perfect, but lately it feels like hell.  I love my job and it is secure.  Since summer my dad has had 4 heart attacks (no heart problems in the family that we know of).  First 3 were minor.  The last one his heart stopped for 4 min. but they were able to revive him.  He is home and gets along for the most part fine.  He is in the early stages of dementia which is the hard part.  Whenever he finds out he has a dr. appt. he will call me several times asking the drs. name and where the office it.  I take him, so that should be a non-issue.  At first my bosses were very supportive but not so much now.  She called this am and I sorta answered abruptly as I was trying to get ready for work and I thought it was my dad.  I told her how he called several times and she said he needed someone in the home with him like in the am.  He doesn't as for the most part he gets out and about fine.  He goes to the mall to walk, to the grocery store and church and any other errands he needs to do.  He fixes all of his own meals, can shower and dresses himself.  He is 81.  I start work at noon and make all his appts. in the am.  I rarely miss work because of him.  He does have an appt. today late afternoon so have to leave work early.  I hope it is a one time deal as they only make appts. in the afternoon.  My boss keeps trying to get me to go to their drs.  My sister is moving back in little over a week, but this was planned before dad started having problems.  She got a job here and will live with dad so things will be less stressfull on me.  I have become very jumpy and I get angry sometimes.  My boss said today that dad was a problem for me, my sister and for them, which makes no sense at all.  I think the only thing that should concern them is that I am at work and get my work done.  I have to have like 8k worth of work on my teeth and since I dont have dental insurance, they are paying for it.  My therapist told me that when I shut the door at work at the end of the day, to forget about work.  I do do some work at home and whenever I talk to them on the phone or go over to their house they constantly ask about things out here at the complex.  There are things I should decide on my own being the manager but I have to thru them and get approval.  If not, and I do the wrong thing, they will get all upset and he does alot of yelling and you cannot argue with him.  I try to do whatever to make my life less stressful.  I have leases that have not been signed off on that should have been a while back and I know when I give them to her, she is likely to go off on me.   I want to stay here as I love my job and my tenants ect.  I just need to find a way to make things less stressful for me.

Elite Member

Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 14995
   Posted 2/18/2010 7:11 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Chelsi and welcome to Healingwell. You sure do sound as if you have your hands full. So many folks are in the same situation as you these days as our parents are aging. Hopefully with your sister moving in with Dad that will take some of the pressure off you and help you get back to the things you need to get done. Your employer should not be yelling at you like that though. No one should ever make another person feel bad. Hopefully once you get the situation with your Dad settled, you can take some time and speak to your employers and clear the air with them. Good luck to you!

Gail*Nanners* Co-Moderator for Crohns Disease & Anxiety/Panic
Crohn's Disease for over 34 years. Currently on Asacol, Prilosec, Estrace, Prinivil, Diltiazem, Percoset prn for pain, Zofran, Phenergan, Probiotics, Calcium, Vit D, and Xanax prn. Resections in 2002 & 2005. Also diagnosed w/ Fibromyalgia, Osteoarthritis, & Anxiety. Currently my Crohns is in remission, but my joints are going crazy!
*Every tomorrow has two handles.  We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle of faith"*
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