Positive Ways to Manage the Fears of Lonliness

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Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 3/29/2010 2:07 PM (GMT -7)   
Good Afternoon my friends,

This is one of my own demons so I thought it would be a good topic for all of us to work on that have social anxiety or phobias.

Sometime or another we will experience a time when we are alone. The first step is to become comfortable with yourself and having the self-confidence that you will be able to manage being alone. There is nothing wrong with being alone. If being alone bothers you then seeing a counselor can help you with these issues. In the meantime, here is a short list of techniques that a person can use so that the fear of being alone doesn’t become a major issue in their lives.

One of the first steps is to find an activity that you enjoy and where you can meet a lot of people. For instance, joining a group activity such as a volleyball group, women’s club, or making crafts can be a great way to meet people. Doing something that you like to do will make you happy and will increase your chances of making friends. Spending time with animals can be a great source of companionship. Having a dog or cat can make us feel loved. If you don’t own a dog or cat, then volunteer at the local animal shelter. Spending time with an animal or pet can help us to feel better and can be of good company to all of us whether we are alone or not.

Helping others through community service can be of some help. There are many people out there who could benefit from your time and talents. Helping others can give you a source of pride, help you feel better about yourself, and can provide long lasting friendships. Give it a try and you will be surprised. You can usually pick your own hours too !

Challenge your negative thinking with positive statements and realistic thinking. When encountering thoughts that make you lonely or depressed, challenge those thoughts by asking yourself questions that will maintain objectivity and common sense. For example, some people may think that if they are alone at the present time then they will always be alone. This is not true. Even if your alone today doesn’t mean that you will be alone all the time. No one can predict the future with one hundred percent accuracy. It isn’t fun being alone, but sometimes there are worse things.Don’t let the stinkin thinking thoughts creep in on you. Don’t anticipate the worse case scenario.

I have tossed out some ideas on how to meet people and would love to hear from each of you how you would deal with the managing the fear of loneliness.

“There’s nothing terribly wrong with feeling lost, so long as that feeling precedes some plan on your part to actually do something about it. Too often a person grows complacent with their disillusionment, perpetually wearing their "discomfort" like a favorite shirt.”

What is you plan? Share your accomplishments too.

Gentle Hugs to All,







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Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 3/29/2010 2:56 PM (GMT -7)   
I am so proud of you and I too have a dog now........how awesome it is to have a pet that loves you unconditionally.
I also hang onto my therapist as when I start to flounder she is there to help me see things in the light of day.
Accepting that I have anxiety and it does not have me was my ahhhh-haaaaaa moment.
Yes I will slip and I may stumble but I will ask for help before I crash whenever I can.  I also let out my feelings and then look for positive ways to make life a better place each and every day.
Thank you for your contribution.
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