Loneliness, amonst other ramblings.

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Regular Member

Date Joined May 2010
Total Posts : 20
   Posted 5/7/2010 11:56 AM (GMT -7)   
I cannot even describe the loneliness I felt - in a room full of people, it's hard to comprehend the fact that I still feel that empty loneliness. But I'm not alone. I recently came to that realization myself - through this message board. I really think even though I've just started with this, it's already been a BIG help. Just to realize that there are other people out there who are struggling with the same difficulties as I am is a small comfort. I don't want it to sound like I'm glad that others are dealing with these anxiety issues, I wouldn't wish this on my least favorite person. But having this community to read through and receive feedback has already slightly reduced the stress I feel on a daily basis. I'm far from being "cured", or whatever the solution would be called, but I feel a real sense of stability since joining this message board. That was (and still is) the thing I need most, and have the least of, in my life. My husband helps as much as he can, but it's frustrating for him since he doesn't really understand my struggle. He's a laid-back, VERY easy-going type of person, which I used to be, somewhat, also. I hope to one day return to that disposition. He doesn't understand
We have been struggling with just having a continuous place to live, which is stressful because I have an 11 month old daughter. I don't want her to suffer from my stress. I want her to have a stable, loving household to grow up in, like I did. Hopefully we will be able to provide that for her - before she's old enough to realize our situation. But right now I have the greatest roommate; she opened her home to us and rents out a bedroom for us, as well as lets us use all of the appliances we may need. She saved us at our most desperate time. I don't know how I can ever tell her how grateful I am to her, let alone show her, or repay her. I guess that's all for now, thank you to anyone who read this, and if you do, please reply. I'd love to hear some of your stories, and I've been told I'm a great listener. I can definitely relate to anyone struggling with panic disorder, anxiety, and stress, and also trying to manage it.

Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 1284
   Posted 5/7/2010 1:15 PM (GMT -7)   
I see that no one replied to your last post... I am terribly sorry about that! I think it might help if you separated your paragraphs.... it can be difficult to read one big block of text...

Are you on medication, MizMoon? Do you have a therapist?
I think I am being picked on by life, sometimes. But's that okay. Life and I are good buddies... I know life doesn't mean no harm. It just is the way it is. I can accept that.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 1745
   Posted 5/7/2010 3:15 PM (GMT -7)   
Yes I agree with Celey. For me, anyway, it's difficult to read writing like that. It doesn't help that I hit my head the other day, either, ha.

I almost had a panic attack while ago. Work is not going well and I just started getting one phone call after another. I have to go up against huge bureaucracies next week. If I don't, they're going to put me out of business. But for now it's the weekend and there's nothing at all I can do, so I have just stopped being stressed out about it. Next week I'm sure I'll arise to the occasion. What they're doing is wrong and I have the law on my side. One way or another it will work itself out. If for some reason it doesn't I'll find a way to make do.

Life ain't easy!

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 5/7/2010 8:24 PM (GMT -7)   
It is so hard to hv all the issues come at you at once but
if you take each one work on it trhu it you will find your way out
you hv been given great input from members already
i will add that if not seeing a therapist i would do so as the others hv said
also agree that its hard to read posts that are all one big post lol ya know what i mean
hoping you have better days
n am glad you hv a friend like that
perhaps doing chores around there n things for her may show yr appreciation
or write a note from yr heart to her for keep as a reminder of how nice n kind she has been
just a thought

Old Hippy
Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 104
   Posted 5/8/2010 2:42 PM (GMT -7)   
The stress alone from being the mother of a young child; while not having a permanent place of your own, and dealing with the anxiety & lonliness, would be hard on anyone... It is a blessing that you have a friend/roommate to help you and your family out in your time of need. Times are tough with today's economy... Debaser, I wish you the best of luck in dealing with the bureaucrats, you are not alone in feeling like life ain't easy, but we all have to keep trucking on--so they say-- lol Anyway, back to RH-- Have you found any support groups in your area that you can go to--in person? There are support groups for parents, anxiety & depression disorders, etc.., it would get you out of the house for awhile and provide some coping skills to help with the everyday stressors. Your responses to my posts have been very helpful, so look I forward to hearing from you again. take care...

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 5/10/2010 6:48 AM (GMT -7)   
Just wondering how you are making out

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 5/10/2010 6:49 AM (GMT -7)   
Debaser my friend ..thinking bout ya n i know you shall slay those dragons

Regular Member

Date Joined May 2010
Total Posts : 20
   Posted 5/10/2010 2:54 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks to all of you who replied. It really helps to have all of your support. I saw a counselor in the past, and she did help greatly, but I can't afford one now. As far as groups in person - I'd love to, but I have no transportation and none are within walking distance of where I stay now.

Also, I'm sorry about the format of that post - I didn't even realize it would be that long. I just got started and couldn't stop. I promise to pay closer attention in the future. Sometimes when I'm running with a thought my fingers can't keep up and like I said, I never planned on it being so long.

Thank you all again for your kind words and support. I can't express how glad I am to have found this msg board. And so far everyone has been really welcoming, sweet, and helpful.
Oh, and to that question about medication. I do get anxiety meds to help with my panic disorder. In the past I was on antidepressants and antipsychotics, and I hated the side effects. I trembled uncontrollably, and felt like my head was in a constant fog. I tried almost all of them to find one that would help, but they all had adverse side effects. I like to be clear-headed, even when I don't want to be in my head.

Post Edited (MizMoon) : 5/10/2010 3:57:05 PM (GMT-6)

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/10/2010 3:00 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey Miz Moon,

Sorry I am late here in welcoming you to the A & P Forum. I know where your coming from and what your going through as right now I am going through some of the very same feelings of feeling all alone in a crowded room.

Coming here and talking with us is a great way to be in contact with members and know that there are people out here who care about you.

I am lucky and do have a good therapist who I have been seeing twice a week. I am retired and live with my hubby. He is a very busy person and I spend way to much time alone I know. I am trying to work on that but when your feeling down and out it is hard to get motivated but I will make it and so will you my new friend.

We are in this together.

Gentle Hugs,

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