Thanks everyone. I had a pretty good day today. No real issues with my chest and back aching like the previous 2 days. My ears even feel some better today as well. Still no call from the counselor but I did try to call her and just got her voicemail. It only took me 5 minutes of staring at the phone before I picked it up and made the call, haha! Guess I'll have to try again Monday.
The reason I can't just accept the diagnosis from my doctor is because the medicine isn't helping me. Also I've made dietary changes and am just a few pounds away from being in the normal weight range. Also, I feel like appointments are rushed, I get nervous, and I'm not even sure they understand, or do I even tell them, the symptoms I'm having. For instance, this morning my bp was 92/48. It's been running low for weeks and the ear/throat issues have been going on even longer. Do you think I mentioned my blood pressure concerns to my doctor?...Nope!...You know why?...because I'm afraid something is wrong with me. I'm obsessing because I'm afraid something is seriously wrong but at the same time I don't disclose info to my doctor because I'm afraid something is seriously wrong! If that is confusing to you, just imagine what it's like to be in my head right now! I feel like I haven't even really started living my life yet and might never get to do the things I want to in life. Recently this has caused me to spend a great deal of time thinking about past decisions I've made which is depressing.
debaser - Thanks for your advice! It's make me feel a lot better knowing that you have had a very similar experience to mine and you did indeed start feeling good again. That's all I want. I'm sure I'm probably making the reflux worse because I know anxiety and stress can cause reflux. Maybe I am unintentionally causing all of this myself. When I'm not in pain/discomfort it's more easy to accept the acid reflux diagnosis. However, as soon as the pain/discomfort start again that all goes out the window. I'm going to feel better soon!...I'm going to feel better soon!...Hopefully the counselor can help me with this as well.
Howlyncat - Thanks! I don't know why I get so nervous going to doctors, like you said they are human as well. If I could ever get to the point where I wasn't so nervous when going, I would be better at communicating. I've been getting a lot of experience at going to the doctor recently, unfortunately. It is getting easier than it was, for sure. I'm hopefully going to be talking to a counselor soon over the anxiety issues.
csmc3 - Hey, anxiety twin! Yeah, I do the absolutely same thing, for years now, over any ache an pain I get. I, like you, have many times convinced myself that I have some serious illness. With me though, I still wouldn't go to the doctor. All those problems thankfully went away on their own. The gallbladder issues, however, changed all of that. I knew I had to go to the doctor because of those attacks. I know that the anxiety is probably making the reflux worse but I just can't stop having anxiety over it. I hope you are right, that talking to the counselor will help me with the health anxiety and make sure it doesn't come back in another form. I guess it was Saturday at work I kept thinking every customer I waited on was sick and I was going to catch whatever they had? I thought about it all day and it freaked me. Thankfully, that only lasted for one day and hasn't happened since. Hope you had a good day? Please tell me you went and got your prescription! You need to take care of yourself because you have a responsibility to me, as my therapist, until I actually get one. Haha! Just kidding! I want you to feel good so you need to be taking your meds. Thanks for taking time to respond to my posts!