Hello and welcome to HealingWell. I am glad you have joined us and you have already met some of our great members.
Let me see if I can put a different spin on things for you. I remember when I was first married, all the great showers and gifts, moving to a big city, getting a brand new apartment and a year later having my 1st baby boy - Life was grand but I came home from the hospital feeling like I had now done everything in life and what was left for me to do ? I suspect I had some postpartum depression. I was nervous with my baby, he had the colic and cried constantly and I even took him back to the Dr. telling the Dr. I had changed my mind
I think you are overwhelmed right now and all the good things that have happened to you have caused you to worry that they will be taken away.
You may be going through anticipatory anxiety as many of us easily get stuck in the "what if ?" moments.
Anticipatory anxiety is the anxiety one experiences before starting a challenging activity. Most often, anticipatory anxiety is a lot higher than what you actually end up experiencing.
Why do we experience anticipatory anxiety? I think it’s because the panic response is over-zealous about doing its job: trying to locate any danger, in order to protect us. When it can’t find any danger in the present, it looks into the future. Sometimes, the only possible “danger” it can find is something you haven't done yet!
I suspect you have a bit of PTSD also especially losing your brother to a motorcycle accident.
Our son died in a car crash many years ago now but only about 2 years ago did the counselor throw in the PTSD of the accident as I always put on a great act and cried alone so much.
CBT is a great therapy. There is an online course and I will post the link for you :
Just click on the link, register and away you go all online right from you home.
I hope this has helped you in some small way. Take care of you and keep talking with us.
Advocate for youself with your Dr. and do not be afraid to see a new physician.
~~Kitt~~Moderator: Anxiety/Panic, Osteoarthritis, GERD/Heartburn and Heart/Cardiovascular Disease. www.healingwell.com"If you can't change the world, change your world"