When i had panic/bad anxiety in certain places, being in that same place again sometimes can trigger unpleasant feelings/memories and sometimes i'd just avoid going there for a while till the negative feelings tapers off.
i also noticed that at times i get easily anxious/fear nothing when i have to be home alone for a few hours in the night. i guess i fear the sensations of anxiety/panic coming on while i'm alone at night and there is nobody to distract or chat with at that moment, coz i found it a little easier when the symptoms come and i could talk it out with the husbnd or hv a friend to chat with over the phone, but not all the time this is possible. i just had my first session of cbt, while it is easier to apply it when i'm outside or at work, but the challenge comes when trying to focus on the cbt technique when i start to get uneasy at night while alone even though its just for few hours before the husband gets back home from work.
i think it started again when i had that setback about more than mth ago when i had an out of the blue panic attack while doing the laundry at night. i was feeling a little tired then. then for a while i was getting over it slowly and being comfortable again. some days i'd be just too tired and fall asleep right after having dinner, bath etc.
but those days when i feel tense when alone at night and the chores that i would like to do, doesn't get done, while i just sit flipping thru my coping notes/books, popping my benzo, listening to audio clips on the net, and preoaccupied with anxiety/symptoms and a part of me is like what is this? there is more to me than this?? and yet still feeling the unease and looking at the clock waiting for the husband to get back home fast or is there any friend i could call at this hour and stuff.
i know its gonna take time for the cbt to kick in. but i thought sharing it out would help ease the anxiety. there are still fears i need to work on, i could imagine how beautiful and "free" it would be if these fears are more well managed.