Hi Everyone, I'm new here so please bear with me. I've been suffering from panic attacks, nervous anxiety & depression from around 2 years ago. Have suffered this before but not as bad ad as now. I wake up with that constant churning in my stomach ever morning. I live on my one & I'm 64yrs old. I also suffer from very bad depression & I'm on Trazodone for it for the last 3 months but doesn't seem to be helping except to help me sleep.I just want to stay in bed all day & I have the bedroom darkened out but I have 2 dogs & 9 cats to look after so I just get up & feed them & go back to my safe place, my bedroom.
I have a dog walker so my dogs get walked every day. I used to be the one walking them up on the Moors twice a day, now I'm scared to go out of the house & I don't know why. It's very hilly here near the Pennines in West Yorkshire & I've had a few falls. I moved here from Essex in 2006 but was told I have COPD in 2007. I wish I had a house nearer to town but had no idea my health was going to go down hill so rapidly. I am on the waiting list to move to a bungalow but I'm to scared & nervous to move anywhere at the moment.
I have a Therapist who listens to me & has got me an appointment with a Physc Doc for this Monday but I've seen this Doc before before & he makes me feel very intimidated & more nervous. Therapist told me to tell him how he makes me feel. I hate where I'm living which is about
a mile from the nearest town so that doesn't help but I need to get my life under control again before I even think of moving. I'm also on Morphine for leg pain, am on a lot of different medicines.
I used to be so confident & now I'm scared of my own shadow, am on 2mg Diazepam but they don't even take the edge of & I just feel so scared & alone & I can't seem to see alight at the end of the tunnell. Also I'm a recovering alcoholic & on May 5th it'll be 11 yrs from I've had a drink so that is not an option for me either. Can anyone advise me how to deal with this Physc Doc on Monday or is there anyone who feels like me & has any advice on how to get out of this big dark hole I seem to have got myself in to. Thank You all for reading this & any advice would be very welcome. Deirdre
Edit: Deirdre, welcome to HealingWell. I gave your thread a title - you will be sure to hear from our members soon. I will be back after a bit. Kindly, Kitt
Post Edited By Moderator (stkitt) : 4/19/2012 3:22:53 PM (GMT-6)