Posted 9/9/2012 12:29 PM (GMT -6)
I really need some practical advice. Encouragement would be good, too.
I've been working really hard to keep panic attacks from happening at all, and learning how to shorten them to under 10 minutes when they do hit. On the surface this may sound good, but I'm still terrified of the attacks.
When I go places alone, I only do it by bus, which is kind of ironic because that was one of my biggest triggers and a major phobia to overcome. So this has evolved into a fear of walking. I can't stand it, because not only does it terribly limit my freedom, but walking is something that I always loved. The past few days I've gone out, each time with the intention of going for a real walk, but never made it more than 10 minutes from home before I hit a wall that I can't move beyond.
Today HAS to be the day! I have two goals set in mind. The first is to get to the grocery store further from the one where I normally shop, so I can pick up stuff that's not available at my regular store. Mildly terrifying. When I return with the groceries, I want to go to a coffee shop about 40 minutes away, hang out for a while, then walk home. Utterly terrifying.
Please...tell me what I should do to walk through my invisible barrier that tells me I'm stuck in place, and if I don't turn back horrors too great to express will strike me down. Any tips, tricks, suggestions will be hugely appreciated!!!
There's another reason I really want to do this. I'm 48. Ever since I was 5 and started reading Peanuts, I have desperately wanted a beagle. A few days ago, I found one, a gorgeous pup, who will be needing a home in 2 weeks. Beagles need more exercise than my small yard can give him. I have to be able to take him for two long walks a day. This may sound like the silliest reason in the world to be motivated, but understand that when I was 7 and was given a turtle by my folks, I named it Snoopy.
I've been successful at working through a lot of fears in the past, but this one has been more difficult than all the others. So, dear support group, I'm reaching out to you now...any and every suggestion you offer will be pure gold!!!
Thanks so much.