Best to all...
The reason I look I'm looking at the past is to see what I need to change
from the past to move ahead.
Yes, the economy made it hard but I am most reason for my current
In thinking of if/when I get another opportunity I need to have a go for it
I didn't have when I worked at my last career situation, when I needed
to step up and adjust to the changing work climate, changes in inside
competition, new management - who I needed to prove myself all over
again - I was goofing off.
So, although I am active now - at least on some level- after a long
layoff I need to work really hard and consistent, I have never done
both for extended periods of time.
In my case, it was not just a matter of laziness, my random anxiety
which comes and goes, has stagnated me when it has been time to
put my foot on the accelerator.
Specifically, I mean questioning my own ability, sleep issues which
effect my energy and just fear, anxiety which drains me.
I know with my last position, I had reached a point where I was not growing and I needed to learn more of the inner workings of my
company - the logistics of everything of the order, from inception
to insurance, billing to delivery. Of course I had a idea about this
all after a number of years, but the people I worked with actually
did this work before , so they already knew much more than I and
therefore could bring more to the table, as far as a sales call.
I was afraid to delve into this, cause I may not be able to understand
all this. I know, it really doesn't make sense. I overanalyze things to
the point of making more of things than they really are.
One time a supervisor was explaining something simple involving
regulations and I asked him about it repeatingly, well, if it wasn't my
manager who liked me, he was going to report me to upper management, the fact that I was not grasping things.
I understand now, it is ocd,a mental issue that I know how to deal with.
When I was younger, I had no idea of anxiety, ocd, any of it and I appeared stupid, and was very misunderstood in jobs.
Alright, I do not want to drag this out.
I need to let go, can a old - not that old-dog change his ways?
Another thing, what made me effective in sales was the fact that once
I found my way, I was relaxed, just myself, which disarmed people.
But I think part of that was the fact that I had a safety net, in terms of
money somewhat, and I never looked at what I did as a career, having
short and long term goals. In other words, I never looked at my career
like almost every other professional out there.
So what I am saying is this because life was too serious for me to take
it seriously? Can I still operate like I did knowing that I have just blown
at least 5 years and have little margin for error. As well as money.
Kitt - you are right regarding the job interview, but I have little time,
and the competition has a edge - they have been active- so I need
almost any job now. I am sorry I can not expect people to know the
specifics of my situation. That is the inherent issue with a forum like
this, as it is hard to give pragmatic advice.
Anyways, can anyone relate to what I am saying?
S.C -email me back when you have the chance. Thanks.