Posted 12/10/2013 5:13 AM (GMT -7)
really afraid of the cold weather today. i am a smoker which means i have to go outside to smoke. maybe today i will smoke less than usual. i am waiting for some warm pants which i have ordered to arrive. who likes to be cold?
otherwise just pondering my place in the universe. life can seem like such drudgery sometimes. i know i have lots to be grateful for, i just wonder if life is really worth it. i have 9 more years until i can retire. sometimes i wish my mental illness would get worse so i could claim disability and stay home all the time. probably not good for me, but i still wish it sometimes.
my boss was out yesterday, that was nice, since i feel he watches me sometimes. but he will probably be back today. i am at the point where i am running out of work, hopefully that will change.
just random musings on a cold early Tuesday morning.