Thanks for the nice response.
You asked: "have you guys separated now?"
Well, it's a long story. Twenty-nine years of long story.
That is, when it first became evident that she was having an affair, it was 29 years before that situation ended.
It ended when she passed away from a long illness, cancer, she smoked.
It was like seeing a freight train coming at you (her attacking me), and then right at the last second, it veered off the track.
It was like two dogs in a pit. We couldn't get out. We both wanted to stay for the child and then house. By the time the child grew up, we stayed because the house was almost paid for and we didn't want to leave that.
I didn't argue with her. She would argue with me, but I wouldn't respond.
Do you have any idea why she is upset with you? Is she seeing someone else?
My wife was, but I would refuse to officially acknowledge it to myself. If she said she wasn't having an affair, I would choose to believe that so that I could lessen the tension in my house and in my mind.
After her funeral, only then did I feel I could objectively look at the situation, and I did come to the conclusion that she was having an affair. But while we were living in the same house together, it would have been too much stress to be too smart too soon.
Or, maybe, you've had an affair, for you said,
"she doesn't trust me( there was an incident where i did something that has really affected her self esteem) and that my family has caused her so much harm that she doesn't wanna live with me anymore.."
So, that's the same thing but not with the wife straying during the marriage, but with, yourself, the husband committing some sort of offense. is there any way you can give us a clue what that offense was? Maybe she's in the right, and you're in the wrong.
You said, "I have a 15 year old daughter. We have our own house and unfortunately we had booked another home last year ..at that time she didnt bring out any such statements or behaviour ...im so confused and anxious why suddenly so much hate and that too even 3 weeks after the outbursts
Again, you said, "...im so confused and anxious why suddenly so much hate and that too even 3 weeks after the outbursts"
Again, why the sudden outburst from her? Is she having an affair. Have you looked at that and seen any signs?
That was exactly the situation with my wife. She was forced into a situation where her lover changed jobs, and she had to change jobs, too, to work near where he did, so she was forced to reveal something was going on, cause I was going to find out anyway when she changed jobs.
So, with your wife, why the sudden outbursts?
Again, if you had an affair type situation, you've got to look at that.
What is your part in this?