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Anxiety and panic attacks start to get hold of me... help me to revert this!

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Anxiety & Panic Disorders
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AlexSante90
New Member
Joined : Feb 2021
Posts : 4
Posted 2/14/2021 11:19 AM (GMT -7)
Hello there smile

I'm Alex, in my late thirties. I was always qualified as a "tranquil strength". Sure, i was often worried about school performance, about other's perception of me, about this and that. But it didn't prevent to move on, to rest, to have adventures.

Nonetheless, some anxiety about the future started to pile up, as my parents grew older, my mom retired, many of my younger cousins started to have families while i was single. But the tippoint point was two years ago, when i took my first real job in the corporate world, and in a new industry, in a new city where i didn't want to live. I had a panic attack in the plane when i went for my interview. One month before my expatriation, i started to have extrasystoles, did exams, doc didn't see anything, and it went away after a few days. And during those two years, i had several physical manifestations of anxiety, and/or anxiety being created by physical problems: sore throat for 6 months, some kind of reflux, heartburn, etc. And every 6 months, a panick attack. Always the same routine, i go to E.R., do blood checks & all, nothing to report.

Now i came back to my home country, but still away from my family. Intense job. Lockdown, a bit alone. And in a downward spiral, my mind is focusing on some kind of heartburn/GERD that is becoming permanent (see thread: https://www.healingwell.com/community/default.aspx?f=45&m=4237333#gsc.tab=0), and every symptoms increase the anxiety, the fear boost the symptoms and prevent me to go see a doctor as i'm afraid of invasive exams.

Every night, even if i elevate my head, i feel a discomfort, a weight in my chest/belly, even if i do stretching, yoga, eat well... and the mind is focusing on it, and have difficulties letting go, to sleep, afraid that this problem is something bad, that i won't wake up.

In other words, this situation starts to be super annoying and a hindrance, preventing me to take the plane now, or the boat, or any situation that would make me self-aware of being stranded from civilization, from a doctor, etc.

Your concrete advice would be much appreciated, thanks smile

Post Edited (AlexSante90) : 2/14/2021 1:36:35 PM (GMT-7)

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Tim Tam
Veteran Member
Joined : May 2016
Posts : 1807
Posted 2/14/2021 6:00 PM (GMT -7)
You say,

"Every night, even if i elevate my head, i feel a discomfort, a weight in my chest/belly, even if i do stretching, yoga, eat well.."

I have chest discomfort, also, and find that a heating pad helps that. It enlarges the blood vessels and rushes more oxygen and nutrients to the injured area. Do you have a heating pad?

I keep mine plugged into the wall by my bed.

When I was about 28, I was out of a job, away from people, in my apartment by myself and was getting in such by shape nerve-wise, I knew I should see a psychiatrist. I was the youngest child and never had learned to solve my own problems, always counting on my older siblings and my parents.

But now here I was living by myself and having big problems and I didn't know what to do. I knew what to do, but I couldn't do it. My negativity was coming home to roost.

It got worse and I finally got to a psychiatrist. Turned out I was bipolar.

Turned out my mother's mother was bipolar, so I inherited that, because it can skip a generation (my mother didn't have it). In my mother's mother time, 1930's, 40's, they didn't have any medicines for emotional problems, and she spent some years in a state mental hospital 100 miles from home.

Today, and for the last 50 years and more, they have many very effective medicines. So I've seen, or heard about, a lot of change.

As a bipolar, I'm on Lithium for my mania and Mirtazapine for my depression. And it has been really helpful for the past many years.

Have you ever considered going to a psychiatrist?
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AlexSante90
New Member
Joined : Feb 2021
Posts : 4
Posted 2/16/2021 3:45 PM (GMT -7)

Tim Tam said...
You say,

"Every night, even if i elevate my head, i feel a discomfort, a weight in my chest/belly, even if i do stretching, yoga, eat well.."

I have chest discomfort, also, and find that a heating pad helps that. It enlarges the blood vessels and rushes more oxygen and nutrients to the injured area. Do you have a heating pad?

I keep mine plugged into the wall by my bed.

When I was about 28, I was out of a job, away from people, in my apartment by myself and was getting in such by shape nerve-wise, I knew I should see a psychiatrist. I was the youngest child and never had learned to solve my own problems, always counting on my older siblings and my parents.

But now here I was living by myself and having big problems and I didn't know what to do. I knew what to do, but I couldn't do it. My negativity was coming home to roost.

It got worse and I finally got to a psychiatrist. Turned out I was bipolar.

Turned out my mother's mother was bipolar, so I inherited that, because it can skip a generation (my mother didn't have it). In my mother's mother time, 1930's, 40's, they didn't have any medicines for emotional problems, and she spent some years in a state mental hospital 100 miles from home.

Today, and for the last 50 years and more, they have many very effective medicines. So I've seen, or heard about, a lot of change.

As a bipolar, I'm on Lithium for my mania and Mirtazapine for my depression. And it has been really helpful for the past many years.

Have you ever considered going to a psychiatrist?

thanks for the message smile

the thing is, i would like to try to heal the physical problem, before eventually considering going to a psychiatrist. Unless, perhaps, it's something in my mind that is provoking this. But i'm super wary of taking any psy medicine, don't want to rely on this.
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Tim Tam
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Joined : May 2016
Posts : 1807
Posted 2/16/2021 5:38 PM (GMT -7)
I appreciate the response, as it gives a good indication as to where you are in this situation.

I once had a problem in which I didn't know if I should move from where I lived or not.

I had once seen a true crime TV show where the detective was looking at a crime and said that the original police group should not have concentrated on suspect A, and ignored subject B. That the police should have run a "dual investigation" and investigated both subjects.

So I applied that to my problem of, should I move or should I stay? In other words, look into the possibility of moving by calling different apart. complexes as to price, etc. But also, improve your situation at your current address, so if you decide to stay that will be possible.

I decided to stay, and the improvements were already done.

In your case, you have a dual situation. One physical and one emotional. Why not work on both?

Why not go to a general practitioner about the physical problem, and a psychiatrist about the emotional problem?

You don't have to take any medicine that the doctor might recommend, but it would be good to get his or her opinion, and also to have a psychiatrist in case you needed one.

Another thing that might be going on is that you might have negative feelings about the outcome of this. That you might be looking to stay with these problems rather than solve them. If you were raised in a negative household like I was, you might have a negative outlook on things, on problems.

As in "no way am I going to solve this problem."

You could be holding yourself back, as I was for many years.

Were you raised in a negative household?
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vkj
Regular Member
Joined : Jun 2017
Posts : 97
Posted 2/21/2021 9:29 PM (GMT -7)
i was brought up in a family whose response was always dramatic and enlarged to any given situation. Everything was made to look like its going to finish us. But my father was not like that , he was usually calm to most things but i guess on the inside he took a lot. He underwent 2 heart attacks , and finally passed away in dec 2012 to an attack after a gap of 14 years of his first one. Obviously i too had a lot of issues with anxiety and catastrophic behavior reactions which got enlarged after i lost my Job in 2001 , i "learnt" to be a lot more composed in my reactions to things that don't go my way off recently many things haven't, ive been living alone since the past 4 years and always thinking about the future ( old age) , unable to live in the present
anyone else who is in teh late 40's and living alone and thinking what should be the scenario in old age?
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Tim G
Veteran Member
Joined : Jul 2006
Posts : 2951
Posted 2/21/2021 11:01 PM (GMT -7)

Tim Tam said...
I appreciate the response, as it gives a good indication as to where you are in this situation.

I once had a problem in which I didn't know if I should move from where I lived or not.

I had once seen a true crime TV show where the detective was looking at a crime and said that the original police group should not have concentrated on suspect A, and ignored subject B. That the police should have run a "dual investigation" and investigated both subjects.

So I applied that to my problem of, should I move or should I stay? In other words, look into the possibility of moving by calling different apart. complexes as to price, etc. But also, improve your situation at your current address, so if you decide to stay that will be possible.

I decided to stay, and the improvements were already done.

In your case, you have a dual situation. One physical and one emotional. Why not work on both?

Why not go to a general practitioner about the physical problem, and a psychiatrist about the emotional problem?

You don't have to take any medicine that the doctor might recommend, but it would be good to get his or her opinion, and also to have a psychiatrist in case you needed one.

Another thing that might be going on is that you might have negative feelings about the outcome of this. That you might be looking to stay with these problems rather than solve them. If you were raised in a negative household like I was, you might have a negative outlook on things, on problems.

As in "no way am I going to solve this problem."

You could be holding yourself back, as I was for many years.

Were you raised in a negative household?

I appreciate the way you think.
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Tim Tam
Veteran Member
Joined : May 2016
Posts : 1807
Posted 2/22/2021 11:18 AM (GMT -7)
Thanks Tim.

How is your positive thinking?

Are you able to think positive when trying to solve a problem?
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Tim G
Veteran Member
Joined : Jul 2006
Posts : 2951
Posted 2/22/2021 11:39 AM (GMT -7)
Tim Tam- Yes I am able to use positive thinking in soliving a problem.
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Tim Tam
Veteran Member
Joined : May 2016
Posts : 1807
Posted 2/22/2021 11:47 AM (GMT -7)
vkj:

I don't think like that. I enjoy living alone.

Earlier in life, I didn't like the idea of being alone for a long time. But after I was in a difficult marriage for many years, when that ended through an illness, I didn't have any desire to be living with anybody.

I am concerned about health problems and nobody's in the house. Then I thought, why not learn to use the cell phone and carry it with you in case you need it? That was a good idea in theory, but then it keeps running out of battery power, then running of minutes, then they change my number because I haven't updated the minutes lately.

So, my self-help system is in shambles.

Sorry to hear about being raised in a difficult situation. I was raised in a negative household. Glad you learned how to be more composed when problems occur.

I just assume if I get sick, if I can make it to a phone, I will have some help come in and prepare my meals, sort of thing. And if its bad, I'll have to go to a nursing home.

I think about wanting to use my health while I have it.
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Tim Tam
Veteran Member
Joined : May 2016
Posts : 1807
Posted 2/22/2021 11:50 AM (GMT -7)
Tim G.

How did you learn positive thinking?

Were you raised in a positive household?

What is your situation now? Anxiety? How is that going?
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vkj
Regular Member
Joined : Jun 2017
Posts : 97
Posted 2/23/2021 10:40 AM (GMT -7)
Tim Tam
i guess what u maybe saying is right , u cant waste a majority of your healthy time( which could be more time than the rest of it ) thinking about what could happen when u will be unhealthy and what could happen

do you have kids?
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Tim Tam
Veteran Member
Joined : May 2016
Posts : 1807
Posted 2/23/2021 11:41 AM (GMT -7)
I have one grown son. Is it your lifelong goal to have children?

Are you asking that in connection with getting help from my child in case I am ill? Well, that's a good possibility.

Well, as they saying goes, "A son is a son until he takes a wife. A daughter is a daughter for life." My son is a son, so getting help doesn't apply.

But I'm use to calling help agencies, so help is help, no matter where it comes from. And I have a good neighbor, and a helper who has been very reliable. So I could probably get my 3 meals a day, thanks from knowing these fine people.
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Tim G
Veteran Member
Joined : Jul 2006
Posts : 2951
Posted 2/23/2021 8:54 PM (GMT -7)

Tim Tam said...
Tim G.

How did you learn positive thinking?

Were you raised in a positive household?

What is your situation now? Anxiety? How is that going?

I learned positive thinking by practicing positive thinking. I was raised in a positive household. I look at anxiety as something to pay attention to on a daily basis, practicing healthy habits, and learning as much as I can about it. Because mine seems to have a genetic component, I have been on meds for 10 years and plan to continue them. I don't look at meds a a crutch, but as an essential part of good mental health. (If I were a diabetic, I would not look at taking insulin as a crutch either. Same kind of thing.) It's easy to forget about preventive, proactive ways to manage anxiety when I'm not feeling anxious, but I know if I don't keep on practicing, I eventually hit a wall of some sort, from which it is more difficult to extricate myself. I've had 10 years of practice at anxiety-management, and my life is better because of it.
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vkj
Regular Member
Joined : Jun 2017
Posts : 97
Posted 2/23/2021 9:17 PM (GMT -7)
Hello Tim Tam ,i have a daughter she will be 19 next month
what medicines have u been on and from how long
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Tim Tam
Veteran Member
Joined : May 2016
Posts : 1807
Posted 2/24/2021 1:15 PM (GMT -7)
vkj:

As a bipolar, I had a psychotic episode at 17, so that was probably an early sign of that. Wasn't on meds until about 28 when I had some sort of emotional collapse, perhaps a mental breakdown, and was put on an anti-psychotic which was like torture and I didn't know if it was the medicine causing the mental confusion and turmoil, or if that was the mental illness from the mental breakdown.

I was on that off and on for about a year. Went in as depressed to a new psychiatrist, who dxed me as depressed, when I was really bipolar, and the anti-depressant (Sinaquan tricyclic) alone, with no stabilizer like Lithium which I'm on now, would give me panic attacks.

Finally got dxed correctly as bipolar, so they put me on Lithium and Sinaquan. Now I'm on Lithium and Mirtazapine anti-depressant. I've been on meds for over 30 years. I'm as level as a billiard table.

You said, "i "learnt" to be a lot more composed in my reactions to things that don't go my way off recently many things haven't, ive been living alone since the past 4 years and always thinking about the future ( old age) , unable to live in the present
anyone else who is in teh late 40's and living alone and thinking what should be the scenario in old age?"

Again, you said, "Unable to live in the present" because "always thinking about the future ( old age)" What do you think is going to happen in the future?" Are you on medicine?

Is there any anxiety in your family's history?
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Tim Tam
Veteran Member
Joined : May 2016
Posts : 1807
Posted 2/24/2021 1:55 PM (GMT -7)
Tim G:

I can't even imagine a positive household. Apparently, I passed negativism onto my now grown son because he and I can't be in the same room together.

No stranger feeling than, "I've created a monster who is out to destroy me."

You said, "I learned positive thinking by practicing positive thinking. I was raised in a positive household."

I was 50 when I learned positive thinking from reading a column in the newspaper. It was written by a woman. It spoke to me. I've been telling people about it ever since.

I look back at the mistakes I made when I was negative and in a way, I can't believe it. Which is what I'm trying to get people to avoid now. When I see others walking down that same road as I did, it really gets me.

You're talking about how much medicine has helped you, I can give you some history of that. My grandmother, my mother's mother, was bipolar which is where I got it from. My mother didn't have it, it can skip a generation.

So my grandmother had bipolar, she just didn't have any medicine, if you can imagine, which you can't. It was in the 1930s and '40s and early 50s, and they had no medicine for emotional problems. They had a mental hospital in every state (see the movie "One Flew Over the Coo-Coo's Nest" with Jack Nickleson.

It had no medicine, but it had high walls. It was 100 miles from her home. So instead of being treated at her home, like we are, she was treated at the mental hospital, which had no medicine.

When she would visit in people's homes, she would look through their medicine cabinet, and anytime she saw some pills she would take some of them. Maybe, one of them would work for her. They didn't.

So whenever we take our medicine, yeah, take it for granted. It wasn't always like this. We were born into the right era.
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vkj
Regular Member
Joined : Jun 2017
Posts : 97
Posted 3/1/2021 10:10 AM (GMT -7)
Hi Tim Tam
as mentioned
"i was brought up in a family whose response was always dramatic and enlarged to any given situation. Everything was made to look like its going to finish us. But my father was not like that , he was usually calm to most things but i guess on the inside he took a lot. He underwent 2 heart attacks , and finally passed away in dec 2012 to an attack after a gap of 14 years of his first one. " ..yes my Mother and my sister have severe anxiety issues ...my father i dunno maybe he did but didn't show but didn't quite seem like it u said uve been on meds since almost 30 years now ...how old are you?
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Tim Tam
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Joined : May 2016
Posts : 1807
Posted 3/1/2021 12:56 PM (GMT -7)
Let's just say I have grandchildren.

Which is how I spend much of my time, writing family history and putting together photo albums for my grandchildren, for my grand nieces and nephews. Yeah, there ain't much going on this time around.

I have "Oh, my gosh!!" reactions to things to. I panic and my thinking slows down. Just the other day, I had a health food pill I needed to take, but I only have 3 mg. tablets, and I needed 1 mg. and I was out of the 1 mg.

My first reaction was to panic. It was a sleep aid tablet and I didn't want to take more than I needed. Then my positive thinking kicked in and actually overrode the panic, and I said, "Cut the 3 mg. pill in half, and just pick out the pieces that look to total 1 mg."

And I did. And the next night I did the same thing. Then the next day, the neighbor who had been saying the 1 mg. sleep aid pills would be at his back door by delivery, came and said, "Oh, those pills were delivered to my mailbox, not the back door as I said on the phone a couple of times. "

So, I was very proud that I had not panicked but that, again, that my positive thinking had gotten through my confusion and concern, and turned a panic situation into a solution.

That I had solved the problem on my own, using the brain that I have, by switching it to positive by saying, "Think positive" before going into the problem.

I never thought of myself as a panic person until you wrote that about your family. That's the first time I've even thought of that. I just thought, my adrenalin gets to going to fast, I can't think. But again, my positive thinking l slipped through that and solved the problem.

A time when it didn't slip through, I don't drive much and took a daring adventure with my dog to a nearby neighborhood. Like going to the moon for me, all the way to the next neighborhood. And driving. My dog and I took a walk around the block and I can't find the keys to the car. I freaked, and I just a few minutes ago realized this is the panic like you said you family did.

I went knocking on doors in the dark of complete strangers asking them to take me home to the next neighborhood (with a busy 4-lane in between and I couldn't cross it). One did, I got in my kitchen, calmed down, looked in my top shirt pocket, not my pants pocket, and there were my keys. There was no problem, I just panicked.
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