Please advise...I'm at my wit's end :(

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Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1986
   Posted 5/13/2006 9:51 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi All,
I'm back after a couple of decent months, then out of nowhere it seems, I was "knocked down" on Thursday afternoon. I guess I should say first that I have GAD and depression. I've been on 200 mg. of zoloft a day for over 10 years now. I am also on xanax and buspar. I had been doing very well for a number of years when I had a bad relapse back in late January. During that time, I went to my shrink and he refused to up my xanax (I'm on .25 mg 4x a day) and said he would NEVER give me more than that amount...NOT EVER. instead, he put me on wellbutrin and after taking it for a week, I had went waaaaaaaaaay down into the depths and I stopped the wellbutrin!!! I lost about 20 lbs in a month or so, that's how bad I was. I went back and thankfully got to see another doctor and she said I could take extra xanax as needed and felt I did the right thing in stopping the wellbutrin. After a few days, I started feeling back to my regular self. Then a couple of weeks later, BOOM! However, I started feeling better again and so for the last couple of months I was relatively happy. I went to a nurse-practicioner last week and had to go thru the whole story with her about my incident with the shrink , etc., as it was my first time seeing her. Well, she starts talking about maybe i should try klonopin for anxiety. I told her that since I was "holding steady", I'd stick with the xanax. Then she starts saying that a lot of patients do well with prozac and xanax. AGAIN, I told her that since I was "holding steady" that I'd rather stick with the zoloft I was already prescribed (afterall, I really was doing okay at that time!) So fast forward to Thursday. I'd just sat down to eat when I felt a near panic attack come on. Thankfully I am also on 100 mg. Atenolol for BP and it might've prevented an actual attack. I sat there and rode the anxious feeling out. Of course, I popped into a sweat and had to run to the bathroom with IBS. Since then, I've been way down again. I want to cry all the time and my IBS is giving me a fit. I've lost 4 lbs. in a week (my IBS had been acting up for a couple of weeks prior to Thursday). I feel some anxiety, but this time I'd say that the depression is a bit more intense, whereas it's usually the anxiety. So after all my long-winded blabbering here, I need to ask you folks, have any of you ever changed from xanax to klonipin? From zoloft to prozac? Did it work for you? Did you get worse? Is it too risky to switch an anti-depressant after all these years of having reasonably good success with the one I've been on so long? Anyone had success on any combination of these drugs? I UNDERSTAND THAT WHAT WORKS FOR YOU MAY NOT WORK FOR ME AND VICE-A-VERSA, BUT I JUST NEED SOME FEEDBACK, in case I try a change. This is sooo scary for me to contemplate. I am weak and tired from the constant IBS. I don't want to get up in the mornings. I hate myself for being this way. I am too cowardly to kill myself, but have feelings of wishing that I could. When I'm so anxy and depressed, all I can think of is how much I wish it was all over with. But I'm not truly suicidal because it would kill my Mom if I did that and it's against my religion. I just had to express how I've been feeling inside. I know that y'all understand. My Mom is effected by my depression (we live together) and she gets sad and upset and even mad. I try to protect her from my feelings, but it's usually too hard to pretend. So then I have that load on my mind as well. Please somebody, tell me something. You have a captive audience in me! Thank you so much!
janetlee sad

obs ann
Veteran Member

Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 679
   Posted 5/13/2006 11:27 PM (GMT -6)   
Janetlee, I don't know anything about changing meds cuz I've been on just the xanax since nothing else works for me, for many years now. But I just wanted to say, I'll be praying with you for wisdom on what to do or wisdom for your Dr. to know what to do. I feel like I've been pressed against a wall with nothing left to turn to but faith for a while now. I wanted to "bail" too, but of course would never do that, and for the same reasons you mentioned. It hurts to many others and it's just morally wrong in my beliefs also. So all I can offer you is my empathy and prayers and know that sometimes we are pressed in like this sometimes for just that reason, to increase our faith. To show us Who really Is There for us - in the long haul.
I fight depression by being "others minded". That is what I was taught and I found it is the greatest way in the world. When I was physically not sick, I loved volunteer work.
It's important to talk with people who bring you up and boost your faith, rather than freak if you tell them you're depressed. I found that out the hard way too. If you have a good friend who understands you, that's worth all the riches in the world. They always know what to say and when. I hope you have a buddy like that, that you can call and be uplifted by.
I love laughing too. I think that is another saving grace.

Well, I've talked your ear off enough.

Don't give up hope and others will be by with a positive word for you and any experience they can share.
You're in my prayers and hugs from the heart.
LateNeuroLyme + CFIDS = Lord knows what.
Romans 8:28 ~ And we know that ALL things work together for the Good,   Y
for them that Love God, for them who are the called according to His purpose. 

tangerine bear
Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2005
Total Posts : 941
   Posted 5/14/2006 1:42 AM (GMT -6)   
hi janetlee,

I have never taken either of those drugs, and I would be worried about changing just like you are. My doc has given me samples of different antidepressants before, and I always chicken out and stay on the one I've been on (Lexapro). I am sure that it is because it took me 3 different ones before I found one that didn't make me feel awful, but I hate the thought of going through all that again. I am also on xanax, but don't take it on a regular basis, just a few times a week usually, if that. I don't know anything about klonopin in comparison, but you could look it up on the internet and read up about it. I have been told that some of the benzos are longer acting than xanax, but I'm not sure if that one is or not. Best of luck with the med changes, and let us know how you are doing.

It's a jungle out there.....
Theme song from "Monk" by Randy Newman

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 5/14/2006 8:21 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi and Welcome I see our Ann and bear has given you some great advice already, I have also been where you and they have and my spiritual beliefs as well as lack of courage and knowing first hand what it does to you when someone leaves us like that stops me for sure......I know you will find plenty of peeps here for your support and understanding so please keep coming back and let us help you out .......God Bless...Lyn
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 A real friend walks in when the rest of the world walks away

Veteran Member

Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 4031
   Posted 5/14/2006 9:14 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Janetlee,  In my humble opinion, if your seeing a psychiatrist on a regular basis then they should be the one who prescribes your psychiatric medications and makes changes to your dosages.  Not your Primary Care Physician or a Nurse Practitioner. You shouldnt have one doctor trying to change a medication that another doctor prescribed. You did the right thing by stating that you felt you were comfortable with what you are taking now and didnt wish for her to make changes to your medication regime.  Now, when you next go to see your psychiatrist you can discuss the conversation with them and let him decide if these changes are appropriate for you of course with your consent.  The problem most people have with Zoloft and I ran into this myself is that after you have been on it for a certain amount of time it becomes less effective at the higher doses.  This isnt true for everyone as some are able to be on it for years and years but the body does build up a tolerance to the med after a long period of time.  I would suggest talking to your pdoc about it and you and him making the decision together if you need to switch medications.  Take care and good luck.  ~ Elisha


Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1986
   Posted 5/14/2006 11:50 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Els,
the nurse practicioner is at the mental health center. So she is a mental health n.p.
I have to sign off. i feel really bad right now. thanks all!

Regular Member

Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 40
   Posted 5/16/2006 6:43 AM (GMT -6)   

hi, I just wanted to let you know that I have been on klonopin and xanax and actually buspar too... I am not a doctor (of course) I wouldn't suggest that anyone take Klonopin. I became serverly addicted to it and not just mentally. I was on it for three years and when I weaned myself off of it, it was a nightmare. I do believe that Klonopin is the most addictive in the benzo family but following klonopin is Xanax. When I was coming off of the Klonopin I couldn't sleep, eat, couldn't stop shaking i even had mild halusinations. I have heard that it can be compared to heroin to come off of and from personal experiance i believe it. If I were you i'd stick to the Xanax. I was on Xanax for about a year and breaking the ties with it wasn't nearly as difficult I think the hardest part was the mental need for it... i didn't have any of the physical withdrawls like I had from the Klonopin. I guess i'm just saying that i personally think klonopin is an evil drug.

about the prozac i guess i don't really know. I have been put through a series of meds and every one besides the benzos have had terrible effects on me. I was just on celexa and it was working great until a few days ago when every time i stood up i'd get dizzy. any how i feel for you and i truely mean that because i can relate very well to everything i read that you wrote. It's a very frustating thing to deal with... anxiety and the depression on top of it (they go hand in hand)

stay strong and remember that you are not alone in this... chances are when you are feeling this way there are thousands of others feeling it too... it's been helping me to read these posts on here and think to myself "hey i'm not crazy these people know how this feels"

take care

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1986
   Posted 5/16/2006 1:08 PM (GMT -6)   
Thanks for your input, Violet5.
You hang in there too!!!
Maybe if all of us Anxious souls were put on an island together, we'd all chill out because we all understand each other! Don't have to worry about what anyone else is thinking, cuz we're all thinking the same thing...oh well...pipe dreams! ;)
Thank you and take care.
BTW, there's a site that compares different drugs based on individuals ratings and comments. I don't remember if I can list it on this forum though, so I don't want any trouble! If I find that I can, I'll share it with all.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Nov 2005
Total Posts : 1268
   Posted 5/16/2006 6:39 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi janetlee, i just wanted to say welcome and you have gotten great advise, and you always will here, i wish you well
Wow, how scary, sorry violet, ive been on klonopin for 5 years, and although ive never had a problem, i did try to get myself off of it once.....actually i did quite well, until i read about how you CANNOT just quit taking it as it can cause severe seizures. I went cold turkey, cause i didnt read up on it, i just decided one day i was sick of it, i was fine, but scared and started taking them again when i read that......i know it wasnt to bright, but im really stubborn when it comes to taking meds.....i hate doing it, but realize that i have to...:( good luck to all and i hope you find what you need to get you back on track janetlee.

" Dwell not on the past. Use it to illustrate a point, then leave it behind. Nothing really matters except what you do now, in this instant of time. From this moment onward you can be an entirely different person, filled with love and understanding, ready with an outstretched hand, uplifted and positive in every thought and deed."
Eileen Caddy

tangerine bear
Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2005
Total Posts : 941
   Posted 10/6/2006 7:33 AM (GMT -6)   
It's a jungle out there.....
Theme song from "Monk" by Randy Newman

Veteran Member

Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 934
   Posted 10/6/2006 5:27 PM (GMT -6)   
Janet Lee-

"Maybe if all of us Anxious souls were put on an island together, we'd all chill out because we all understand each other! Don't have to worry about what anyone else is thinking, cuz we're all thinking the same thing...oh well...pipe dreams! ;)"

LOL I love this and it is so true!!! We'd have one hellova support system... that's for sure.

"Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars."

Veteran Member

Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 510
   Posted 10/7/2006 12:15 AM (GMT -6)   
Or we'd be free to run around screaming without feeling crazy because everyone would know where we're coming from.

I think trying to hold in the anxiety attacks so we don't make those around us uncomfortable probably works against us. I'd just love to go to a cliff ledge and scream and scream and scream....get some of that pent up crap out of me. lol
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