I'm back and I'm so scared-have to find a new job

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Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 279
   Posted 11/7/2006 7:14 PM (GMT -6)   
Well, I have been feeling pretty good for the past couple of months- even though my husband has now been out of work for 6 months and is unable to collect unemployment- at least my anxiety seemed to have lessened a little.  Then, yesterday, I had another bomb dropped on me- after 18 years at my job, it will be ending at the end of the year- the condominium association I work for has hired a new management company and they are bringing their own people in- all of the office staff will be let go.  I am in total shock!!
I DREAD the idea of starting something new, learning a new job, meeting a whole set of new people, etc.
I really liked my job and the residents of the condominium where I work are so nice!! Many of them are like family to me. (It was a Board decision to do this). I just cannot get myself in the right frame of mind to handle this- it's been a bad year!! Needless to say, I can feel my anxiety coming back and I'm really scared...

Veteran Member

Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 752
   Posted 11/7/2006 9:50 PM (GMT -6)   
Wow, that's a tough blow for any one to handle! You're allowed to feel scared and anxious..just not too much lol.
Us humans HATE change..ewww..so unsettling at first..especially when it's forced upon us!
It's gonna take a little time to sink in..but when you are ready - I know you can handle it!
On the upside of things - sometimes a change like this is a good opportunity to start afresh...new challenges - scarey at first I know but try and have faith in yourself and your ability to cope and grow from this.

Take good care.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 902
   Posted 11/8/2006 2:19 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi. I'm so sorry you are going through this. I wish I could be more comforting but am going through a lot myself. I know it sounds cliche but this could be a BLESSING in disguise. I certainly hope so. Think positive. You have awesome job stability - many employers will want to hire you. You can do it!!!!!!!
DX: chronic migraine, cervical degeneration, depression/anxiety 
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Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2006
Total Posts : 61
   Posted 11/8/2006 4:29 AM (GMT -6)   

I know how you feel.

The company I was working for was purchased at the end of August and I have been out of work since.  To top it off, my wife also lost her job at the end of July.  She has started a new job and is happy and I have a new job, however I don't start until 11/20.  The stress of not having jobs may have been what recently caused may anxiety and insomnia to come back.  Our bill have been paid, however we have gone through all of our savings. 

I don't know what to do.  I can't sleep anymore and I feel that there is not going to be anything that will help me.

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 279
   Posted 11/8/2006 9:05 AM (GMT -6)   

Thanks, all, for your words of encouragement! I'm sorry to hear that others are in the same boat, although I guess misery does love company. Hope I can be supportive towards you, like you are towards me!

I know this can be a blessing in disguise, but I really liked my job and am really upset that I have to make a change.  Plus I get stupid comments from others, like my co-worker, who said, "This affects you more than it affects me, after all, you're the primary breadwinner now with your husband out of work" and my close friend who said, "Your husband has to be supportive of you now and maybe reinvent himself and go in a different direction with his job"- my husband is one of the few people who LOVES the work that he does, and I can't take that away from him now!! He will just have to keep looking, hoping that something comes along soon...

I tell myself all the right things- think positive, etc., but I am having such a hard time implementing those thoughts, as I hate being in this position!! I just don't have the drive or the focus to job hunt!! I don't I don't have a choice, but I keep expecting to wake up from this "horrible dream".

I wake up in the middle of the night, paralyzed with anxiety- thought I finally had my feet in the ground coping with my husband's loss of work, and then this hits!!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 2500
   Posted 11/8/2006 7:35 PM (GMT -6)   
I am in a similar boat as far as the job thing. I am looking to switch jobs cause i think the one im in is causing some of my depression and anxiety but am totally petrified of the search process and change. Hope it all goes well for you .

...I dont want the world to see me, 'cause I dont think that they'd understand
When everythings made to be broken, I just want you to know who I am..."
--Goo Goo Dolls

"Those who are different change the world,
Those who are the same keep it that way."

“We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”
--George Bernard Shaw

Regular Member

Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 305
   Posted 11/8/2006 7:58 PM (GMT -6)   
I sorry to hear about your job, I know it's hard to find a job, especially going through all the motions or resumes, interviews etc. I have been through 4 jobs in the past 2 years, just because some of the jobs were just too stressful for me. I think that your change can be a blessing in disguise, maybe you can embark on a new adventure in a different field or the same. Either way I know things will work out for you, best of luck to you and I hope the anxiety calms. take care

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 11/8/2006 8:59 PM (GMT -6)   
My heart goes out to you a.l, Wiley and everyone else in a bad job position right now (or no job).  It's really scary being made redundant, especially when you have no control over it.  I hope I can share some positive news.  I recently moved interstate because my partner got a new job. I won't lie to you, it was a harrowing experience getting a new job, I couldn't even get an interview for three months.  Two months on though I am in the BEST job I've ever had with wonderful management and I've made many new friends.  It was a scary process but it has made me learn that I CAN survive being unemployed and going for new jobs and I'm better off than I've ever been.  I know that doesn't help any of you right now, but I just hope and pray it all works out for the best and you can end up in a more positive place like me. 

Dance like no-one's watching

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 279
   Posted 11/8/2006 9:36 PM (GMT -6)   

Meg- I am sooooo happy for you!! How did you get up the courage to do all that?? (As my mom tells me, I have no choice, but that really hasn't sunk in yet) I give the appearance of being outgoing, but I am actually extremely shy, especially in new situations.  I guess that's what's scaring me too...

Well, I hope all of you that are job searching have much success!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 11/9/2006 3:26 PM (GMT -6)   
I truly am so sorry for all of you that are or have gone thru this experience
it is hard and it is nerve wracking to say the least
However I do agree that it can be a Blessing in disguise as well ...........
From what I know of each of you on this thread I do know that you all have certain gifts and abilities to share with others out there and who ever gets you and hires you will be getting the "best of the best" IMO.....
Keep chins up and keep going knowing you are not alone in this and we all are here for you and thanks MEG for the inspiration you shared it is important to hear positive things as we all know
Take care all and my thoughts and prayers are with each of you
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Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 279
   Posted 11/9/2006 5:46 PM (GMT -6)   

thanks,Lyn, for your encouragement!! I am back to the point where I am having a lot trouble eating and sleeping- I think the shock of all of this has to wear off. Plus I still have to go to this current job everyday and hear everyone talk about what  mistakes the Board is making in signing this new management contract and letting me go- makes me feel good that everyone is concerned for me, but doesn't do me a whole lot of good.

Anyway, how have you been?

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 2721
   Posted 11/9/2006 6:45 PM (GMT -6)   
a.l, your mom is right, you just have to do it!!!! That's the only thing that kept me going.  I'm not very brave, I just kept trying and believing in my abilities to be a good employee.  I knew eventually someone would hire me.  Didn't make it any easier!!! It sounds like you are good at what you do.  try and hold onto that and stay positive.  I'm sorry to hear you are having trouble eating and sleeping.  That must be making things worse. ((((Hugs))))

Dance like no-one's watching

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2006
Total Posts : 279
   Posted 11/10/2006 12:08 PM (GMT -6)   
Meg-so glad to hear of your positive attitude and accomplishment!! Actually, believe it or not, I do have a lot of confidence in my abilities; I just don't adjust to new situations real well.  I can't picture myself anyplace else but in my current job.  I hate being the "new kid on the block"!! I think every new job I took (I've actually only had 3 jobs), I went home and cried everyday.  Especially with my husband out of work, my stress level is already high, and I feel like I'm one step away from going over the deep end (although for my son's sake, I know I will do my best to hold it together)
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