I've been marred almost 19 years and this is the first time I've had to really deal with all of this. I have always been able to be more positive about
things and how they may work out. Now it's all different, I can't seem to think of the positive or the "it will all be ok". For the past three months or so, it's just been how bad it could be.
I know that I'm just borrowing this trouble, because it could all be ok, but for some reason I can't seem to accept that. I just don't believe that it will be ok, all I think is that we will loose our house, have to declare bankruptcy, loose our belongings...ect...and have to move away and live with family. I just don't want to deal with that.
We have been happy where we are for awhile now and I just don't want to loose that, but I know the time is coming.
I need a really big box for those memories, fears and anxietys.