As the shock of losing my job of 18 years is wearing off, I find myself being more and more anxious. I just cannot fathom the thought of starting something new right now, especially since my anxiety level is already so high with my husband out of work for the last 6 months. My job was my stability in my life-something I knew I could count on every day. The idea of having to learn something completely new sends me into panic mode! I am now back up to 200 mg of Zoloft and am probably going to make a doctor's appointment for this week. Last time she said she may have to add some Wellbutrin too. I don't know if this is the route I should go...(I did get a prescription for Xanax, but never filled it- I am really scared of it!)
Also went back to therapy- she leaves me with positive thoughts, but I just cannot accept them at this point. I just feel like running away- and am praying that this does not push me over the "deep end".
It is also hard with a 15 year old son around the house-he is very sensitive and I don't want him to hear me vomiting and dry heaving and to see me not being able to eat. My daughter is coming home from college for Thanksgiving and I don't want to upset her either.
I'm also waking up way before I have to, with chest tightness and feeling like my body is paralyzed.
I just don't know what to do with myself!!!!