My panic and my ability to deal with it seems to go very back and forth. Sometimes I'm rational about
it, can see it for what it is and relax through and work on facing my fears...at these times I do pretty well. Then there are the times that the panic is so so intense it seems to own me, it sweeps through over and over and over. I can't think rationally, I can't relax or talk it away and I'm pretty well frozen in my chair. My negative thoughts consume me, things like, what will happen to me, how am I going to get through this day, what if I never get better, what if I get worse...etc.
I know that this cannot hurt me, but the fear of feeling like this forever is so strong. Funny thing is, I've been through all this before...have been dealing with P/A and agoraphobia for 17 years. I have years of proof that none of my fears will come true...they haven't in 17 years they won't now. I guess I start to think that this time is different because the panic is soooo intense sometimes. Why is is that I can't get my body to believe any of this and calm down? I'm also terrified to be home alone, which only started a week ago, but creates days of living hell for me.
Anyone else have these problems, or any advice. Facing three days alone again and just don't know how I will manage it.
Thank you to everyone here, this site and all of you are a small miracle in my life when I have no where else to turn. It is comforting to know that I am not alone in all of this.