fear of becoming delusional

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New Member

Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 12/27/2006 12:16 PM (GMT -6)   
For the past couple of months I have been worrying that I am going to start thinking paranoid delusional thoughts and completely lose touch with reality.I do not know if this is just anxiety or if i am really losing it this time. I dont have the worries of dying; having a heart attack or getting some disease like most people with anxiety have. All I have are the uncontrollable  and obsessive thoughts that i am not thinking normally and I am going to lose touch with reality and end up in a mental hospital.Every morning when i wake up; the fear hits me wondering if today is the day that i lose my mind. For instance when I go out somewhere even though I know the thoughts are not true I am like what if I start thinking that people are following me or when I go out to eat what if people are going to put something in my drink or what if my boss is watching me with a camera. Even though I know none of these thoughts are true I know these are the kinda of thoughts crazy people think and I am worried that I am going to start thinking them and believing these thoughts and end up crazy and it just causes me to feel sooo panick stricken and overwhelmed when i think like this. If anyone else has ever had these kind of thoughts  please let me know it would be so reassurring to know I am not the only one that is this weird and crazy. I hope u guys can make sense of all this it is scaring me to death; just the thought of being labeled as a crazy person terrifies me.

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/27/2006 12:32 PM (GMT -6)   
You are NOT crazy at all I think you just need to get some professional help and have us as your support system
The ppl here are great and know where you are coming from........
Are you on any meds? Do you see a therapist or have couselling at all

A/P is not " being crazy" it is a disorder which can be treated if given the right tools to do so
There is Cognitive behavioural therapy and all kinds of other techniques you can do to help
If not on meds you may have to go on them I am not saying for sure I am only giving my opinion

If you were crazy you would not know it I promise you that
Please do stick around read other threads and see what you really think o HW and the suport and empathy here
I know it is my lifeline as are the peeps here
Take care and post again

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New Member

Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 12/27/2006 1:43 PM (GMT -6)   
I was diagnosed with panic/anxiety about 5 yrs ago by my family doc. He put me on 20mg of paxil which i have been taking since then and has worked really well for me up until about 2 months ago. The panic attacks started again and now I keep having these thoughts of  becoming schizophrenic and completely losing touch with reality, which I think causes alot of my panic attacks. I have also have  done so much research on the topic of schizophrenia and know so many of the symptoms;I am worried i could end up thinking myself into the disorder. If i could only be assurred that i wasnt going to go crazy I think all my anxiety would leave b/c it is really my only fear.

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 365
   Posted 12/27/2006 4:00 PM (GMT -6)   
perhaps your doctor needs to increase the amount of Paxil that you take

Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2005
Total Posts : 109
   Posted 12/27/2006 4:46 PM (GMT -6)   
welcome to HW and let me tell you that you are not alone!!! im in the same boat as you are!! no more panic attacks but sometimes i feel that the world is  totally out to get me. i did talk to a counsler and we got to the bottom of why i feel this way:
A year and a half ago i was involved in a robbery (talk about feeling vulnerable) and ever since then i feel so unsafe knowing that something like that could happen to me again. Now that chances of it are probably slim but people like us (worry warriors) are always think about the "what if's" and it ends up eating away at our lives!! im always thinking things like what if i forgot to lock the door tonight and someones going to sneak in...or...are people thinking that im acting different...am i acting different?? whatever....
reading books about fear have helped me soooooo much i cant even tell you!!! i dont know if you are female or male. but if you are a women i would suggest "the confident women" by joyce meyers. this book has completely inspired me to not sit around and be worried about these things and just be yourself
Talk to you soon

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2006
Total Posts : 275
   Posted 12/27/2006 6:08 PM (GMT -6)   
I had those fears when I first started having panic attacks about 12 years ago - especially the ones about losing touch with reality. Therapy helped me through it.

After the birth of my second child 10 yrs ago my panic came back. Paxil is what worked for me too ( I still maintain a low dose of 10 mg/day). However, there have been several threads here about how SSRIs can stop working for some people. Or like frar said, your dose may need to be increased.

If you never went to therapy for CBT and relaxation, I would definitely go. I really feel that CBT and relaxation are a key to reducing A/P symptoms - even if you are also on meds. The tools you learn are invaluable in coping with and reducing the intensity and frequency of anxiety and panic attacks. I dont know if my A/P would have come back anyway, but I blame it on chemical/hormonal changes after my daughter was born.

Best of luck to you!


Regular Member

Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 91
   Posted 12/28/2006 8:58 AM (GMT -6)   
i didn't take the time to read what everyone else posted because i felt such an urgency to post you myself. i was like that about 2 months ago. now keep in mind the i have an uncle that was paranoid schizo........ my cousin is bipolar and other aunts and uncles with problems so i was certain that i was doomed and that i too was going to be like this. i felt like i was loosing my mind. i didn't want to see or talk to people i quit my babysitting job because the attacks got so bad and i just couldn't thing straight no matter how hard i tried. i was sent to a psychiatric hospital for a consult....... i was told that i was not schizo or even paranoid. even thought i tend to here voices and see things that are not there......... the therapist says i am just very hyper- alert about everything. so you are not alone and these feeling ......well you are not alone at all. please keep us informed. oh they did put me on some meds that help for immediate relief and i am not seeking a doc. that can help with meds for long term help.

God bless you all

New Member

Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 12/29/2006 2:21 PM (GMT -6)   
Thanks you guys for all your replys, they are greatly appreciated. I still have to say I am worried. Sometimes I think it would be better to just go ahead and be insane than suffer with the worries I have to deal with everyday.
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