***Update from a past poster***

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Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 27
   Posted 6/29/2007 6:28 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi all!
Its been a few months since i've posted last. I was a frequent poster last winter when my panic and GAD symptoms first hit. Things had gotten a lot better, I was and still am seeing a behavioral therapist. I was getting really good at doing exposure therapy. I even stopped taking my Xanax for 2 months!! I was sleeping over at friends houses, going out on the town, and just doing things that I forgot I could even do! The anxiety was still there and I got overwhelmed sometimes, but things were getting much better.
---But recently, one of my best friends (one who knew about my anxiety/panic, and helped me do exposure therapy) moved away. On top of that, I learned a former fraternity member of mine back in college committed suicide. Also, I'm 22 and about to move out of my parents house after being back for a year.
---All of these factors have brought back my anxiety and sometimes panic full force. When I think about my friend that committed suicide I get really anxious and panicky because I think to myself "what pushed him to that?" ... "could my anxiety/panic ever push me to that!?!?" And then I get nervous that since I am thinking about suicide, that I am suicidal. But I am sure that is do to us anxiety people imagining the worst. Its just really scary. I mean...I am so petrified of death that I could NEVER take my own life.
---Exposure therapy has been a lot harder too...it seems like my progress is fading, I even found myself in tears last night because I felt so alone. Alone because I have just been pretty much going to work and coming home to sleep. No real social interactions ouside of work.
---Also, the moving out part scares me! I was out of the house during college and then moved back home, not because of anxiety, just because there was a problem where I lived. I worry that when I move into my new place that I will just go crazy, or be so worried and scared and panic-ridden that I will have to move back home. And that would be a HUGE blow to my confidence over this ailment we call anxiety.
Can anyone give me any advice, are setbacks normal for people with A/P? This just seems like i'm starting at square one again sometimes! And does it sound like i'm suicidal? It just scares me to death.
Thanks for reading my rambling post :/.
-Tyler/22/OCD and A/P. Paxil 60mgs daily, .5mgs Xanax as needed.

Regular Member

Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 119
   Posted 6/29/2007 7:29 PM (GMT -6)   
Setbacks are very common as we walk through new seasons of our lives.

During the time when your A/P was less pronounced, what good behaviors, activities and thought patterns characterized your life? Do those good attributes still exist in your life?
You're definitely not starting at square one. Think about all of the things you've learned about anxiety - you're not the same person you were when you first developed the symptoms.

My setbacks usually occur when I get lazy and quit doing the things that I've learned over time are good for me. In fact, I'm going through a set back right now! Shall I join your club or do you want to join mine? : )

Elite Member

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 6/29/2007 10:27 PM (GMT -6)   


First of all you have a fair amount of stressors in your life right now so please don't be so hard on yourself.  Your human, it is ok. 

I agree with Christian. It's "normal" for those of us with anxiety to have setbacks even when we feel like we're making progress. Two steps forward and one back is a pretty good ratio, I think.

If I can have setbacks but still be making forward progress overall, then I'm happy with that. As much as we'd like it to be the case, it's unrealistic to think that when we have a good days, weeks or months  of being anxiety-free, that it will never return.

The key is not to let it get you down. Chalk it up as a bad anxiety day, and move on from there. Tomorrow is a new day. Tomorrow doesn't have to be filled with anxiety.

Believe in yourself and keep posting as we are your support system.

Safe hugs

Moderator Anxiety ~ Panic Disorders

Dx: Anxiety/Panic, Depression 
"If you doubt you can accomplish something, then you can’t accomplish it. You have to have confidence in your ability, and then be tough enough to follow through.” 
~Rosalyn Carter

Veteran Member

Date Joined Nov 2006
Total Posts : 1745
   Posted 6/30/2007 3:54 PM (GMT -6)   
From what I understand, it's very rare for an anxiety patient to commit suicide. I wouldn't worry about that unless you have a lot of depression or something, too. If you ever start feeling like that, seek help immediately, but otherwise have confidence in yourself. It sounds to me like you know you wouldn't do it.

Anyway, setbacks ARE normal. In fact, "normal" people who are going through what you're going through will experience intense anxiety. It's just part of being a human being, but since you're predisposed to anxiety/panic it really has your head spinning. That's understandable. I think it's important for you to realize that the setback is temporary and you will bounce back. Not only that, once you get through it you may even be better off than you were before.
My Brain: My friend, My enemy: A blog to chronicle my attempt to recover from anxiety/panic disorder

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 7/2/2007 4:47 PM (GMT -6)   
HI there
Glad to see you have come back for some care and support
I dont believe you have to worry about harming self either I do remember you and your problems from last yr and I know you have the ability to get thru anything

Please stay with us and continue to post ......and get support

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