Thank you kitt for checking up on me, I am doing a bit better today. I guess I just need to go through feeling crummy for a while, but I know it will pass. I went through something similar when she started kindergarten and again when she went to jr. high and survived both of those. This just seems like the beginning of really having to let her go and be on her own which will lead to her eventually leaving home for good.
Dolores, you are so right, and I hadn't thought of it that way. I am proud of the job I've done, she's a great kid and I'm very lucky that we have a very close relationship which will last as Machelle said.
I'm working on coming up with ideas to fill my time so I don't have too much to think. I'm hoping to do a little writing again, I used to write alot, so would love to return to that. I also think I'll go back to doing my crafts that I then sell on e-bay. I put a few of my things in our garage sale last week and got really positive comments about them. I enjoy doing crafty things, so that will probably be something I'll dig back up.
I do have ideas, it's just that right now I think I need to get through the icky feelings, let them be and then let them go when I'm ready. I'm thankful that I've been in therapy now for nine months and we've been dealing with this very issue, so I guess I'm ahead of the game there. I know I'll be okay in time.
Thanks again to all of you for caring. You've all made me feel much better and not so alone in this!