Hi Purple Dream,
First, I am so sorry that you are going through this - with these kinds of issues, we need all the support and understanding we can get. It helps us to deal with and hopefully overcome these problems.
Second, I soooo agree with Kitt on everything she told you - you cannot pretend to be happy, not depressed, not anxious, etc. I believe this will only harm you more and your recovery will be much longer. You need to continue to be yourself even if it means being depressed and anxious.
Third, your b/f really does need to try to understand these issues - he needs to remember that you are not one of his employees where he can't give into their emotions. You are his g/f and you need to be treated differently than an employee. I think Kitt's idea of him going to a therapy session with you is a great one - there he would be able to get some answers and help him understand the problems you have. If he isn't willing to do this, then maybe he just isn't the person for you - I know that sounds cruel, but you must think of yourself first. You absolutely MUST take care of you now - that is your #1 priority, not your b/f's inability or not being willing to try to understand these problems.
I have to say that my husband immediately stepped up to the plate to make sure I got everything I needed and continue to need. However, he's not a big reader, so getting him to understand the anxiety issues as well as the Bipolar issues is a bit of a task. But I am going to try to get him to talk to the psychiatrist this week a little bit about the BP and the Therapist about the anxiety. Maybe that will help him understand. He is super supportive in every other way though.
I wish your b/f could be the same way. But you really do need to remember - YOU ARE YOUR OWN FIRST PRIORITY AND YOU MUST CONCENTRATE ON TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF. I have been told this so many times by everyone, that I am beginning to believe this. I have to work on me getting better and so do you. I am not trying to be cruel or bossy to you, but I want you to understand that you come first in your recovery. Not your b/f. Maybe you could make a couple of new friends that would be supportive to you - it's a thought. But you always know that you have us at HW. Please keep posting so that we can help and support you.
Many gentle ((((((((((HUGS)))))))))) for you.
Agoraphobia, Barrett's Esophagus, Bipolar Disorder, Depression, Fibromyalgia, Mitral Valve Prolapse, Panic/Anxiety Disorders, Restless Leg Syndrome, Severe Acid Reflux, Sleep Apnea, Social Anxiety and PTSD
Meds: Ambien CR, Ativan, Celexa, Flexeril, Lamictal, Neurontin, Nexium, Requip, Ritalin ER
A slip of the foot you may soon recover,
but a slip of the tongue you may never get over.