How do you tell???

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Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 1303
   Posted 11/19/2007 12:22 AM (GMT -6)   
I guess I could use some cheering up. I been really down and its only been getting worse. I had a weird/scary experience tonight, but I talked it through with my friend. I am so glad she is there for me. But I was wondering, how do you tell loved ones that what they see is not the truth?
I mean, my parents and friends see me everyday, but they dont know what is going on with me. They think things are fine and nothing is the matter. Most everyone can tell I have changed, my mood is different, and I am almost always sad, but they dont know how bad it really is. I let on that it isnt bad, I hold it all in. I try to be strong, but maybe I am to strong. I want to tell them, but how is one to tell there friends and family what is really going on and how bad it really is???
I want to. But, I dont want them to worry. I dont like to burden others with my problems. I figure other people have enough to deal with, why bother them with my stuff.
How did you tell people?? And how did they respond?
Just some thoughts...Thanks in advance. Take care.

Regular Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 164
   Posted 11/19/2007 4:54 AM (GMT -6)   
I have to say when I told my family, it was difficult because, like you I didn't want to let anyone down and be "Strong", when in actual fact I was letting them down by not telling them and accepting it myself and I was being strong in tackling the problem head on. I felt that a huge weight had been lifted off of my shoudlers and everyone was so supportive. The funny thing was once I told a few, I couldn't stop telling people and the more people I told, the more I discovered that friends of mine also suffered and had kept quiet. There is one lady down my local who suffers awful panic attacks, has been admitted to A&E several times, and it was great to talk to her. So, I would definitely recommend that you talk, its good therapy and will help you accept your situation. If I hadn't have confided in my close ones, I probably would never have admitted it to myself and would certainly not have seeked help via medication and CBT. Go for it girl, can it be worse than panic attacks? I seriously doubt it!
Smile and the world will smile with you

Elite Member

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 11/19/2007 10:29 AM (GMT -6)   


Hey there, first of all you are not a burden and you will never be one so please turn that thinking around.

I hid my problem for 24 years from many.  When I finally just told them they laughed and thought I was joking.  I was crushed and finally they believed me.  My family has been supportive but unless you live with your own mental health disorder it is difficult for people to understand.

I would suggest you start with the most important person you want to share this info with and just tell the truth.  Also add that having this person's support is very important to you.  Just being there for you is what you need the most.

You can do this...................gentle hugs to you and keep posting.



Moderator Anxiety ~ Panic Disorders
*~* Not a mental health professional at all *~*
Dx: Anxiety/Panic, Depression, GERD, Osteoarthritis
*Wife of a Crohnie*
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 1303
   Posted 11/19/2007 2:30 PM (GMT -6)   


Kitt, I actually started telling people. I started with my mom, but I didnt get really far! Then, my best friend, who didnt understand at all. She was lost and had no idea what I was talking about. Then, I told my school counselor. She wants to help I think, but I don't think she fully understands how bad it is for me. Mostly because it is hard for me to let it show. Sometimes I think it really isn't that bad, but it is. And it is hard for me to show it. I don't want people to know that I am not as strong as I seem to be. But, no one is perfect, we all have weaknesses. I guess this is mine.

So, I still go talk to her, once a week now for about 3 months. She still doesn't know everything though. I have a very hard time opening up in person. Then, I told my other best friend. That is where I hit gold! She understood and come to find out she has gone through some of the same things! She knows what I am talking about! She constantly lets me know she is there for me. I don't know what I would do without her. Just last night, I had something happen, I text her anytime I need her and we will text for hours at a time. She helps me talk through whatever is going on. I couldn't do it without her. She is encouraging me to speak up, but not pushing me.

I am sure, one day it will happen. I hate to hide it, but its hard for me to accept my weakness. So, luckily I have her for now. And you guys of course! I let her know how much she means to me and how much I appreciate her being there for me. Which is good, because I trust her and I can tell her anything and she will understand.

Just not sure how I will tell my parents. Or family. And how they will respond to it.  

So, thanks guys. Take care! yeah

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