Hello any one. It's just not a good day. I guess I never really told my story. I was married for twenty-one years to an Italian in New York. I have always had every-thing to do with raising the children. I am from Ohio. I have had depression for many years, with my exes cheating on me. Allof that cultural bull. Then being diagnosed with the m.s. just made things worse. In 2000 I finally got enough nerve to divorce him, he was from a very prominant family. I had two of the children here with me until two years ago.naturally teenagers went for the money. So I am sick, severly depressed. I was dating a man here who I really still care for but he's an alcholic and won't admit it. So now I'm mourning that loss also. It's kind of like I don't know who I am anymore. I was always mom. or the wife or the girlfriend. I have to sell my home that my ex purchased for me and the kidsin five months. And I have no clue where I'll end up. I guess I'm just scared. I am taking my meds, and have found a new neurologist els, I guess I just needed to vent a little. sorry this was so long. Kris44
Hi Kris ,sorry your so lonely and going through so much now .Iwish I could help you in some way but I can,t ,hopefully some here can help you .You take care and keep up your chin it will get better soon.
sick of meds
Thank you so much for your response. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. I'm trying so hard to stay positive, Thanks for caring. Kris44
Hi Kris,
there must be something you like to do, or would like to learn,
My Mom when my Dad died got very depressed, wouldnt do anything just sat and watched TV, i got angry at her one day, told her to go and learn something, and get outside, Well she went and joined a knitting Club, the a Dancing Club, then a walking club, and a travel club, believe me she never looked back, she re married, out lived that one and met another man and re married for the third time, both of them wonderful people, so maybe look into joining a club or two,
it will help take your mind off the where you going to end up thing, and may change your life in that maybe you may meet someone you can share your life with again, someone who will treat you good
hope this helps
there must be something you like to do, or would like to learn,
My Mom when my Dad died got very depressed, wouldnt do anything just sat and watched TV, i got angry at her one day, told her to go and learn something, and get outside, Well she went and joined a knitting Club, the a Dancing Club, then a walking club, and a travel club, believe me she never looked back, she re married, out lived that one and met another man and re married for the third time, both of them wonderful people, so maybe look into joining a club or two,
it will help take your mind off the where you going to end up thing, and may change your life in that maybe you may meet someone you can share your life with again, someone who will treat you good
hope this helps
Thank you Brownleaf. I have always been interested in art drawing. reading. and walking but it has always been alone. I tried joining the Y here but it was to expensive. but I will look into other groups right away. Thanks again. Kris44
Hi Kris, I am sorry I am so late with responding my MS is acting up also, and I have been dragging the last few days. You have been through so much and are entitled to vent all you want, so let it out. Being sick with this most terrible illness, not knowing what your future is going to hold is scary. Taking a handful of pills everyday, endless doctor appointments, spasms, numbness, headaches arghhhhh...wait!!! I'm not being too positive here am I? 
Oh then you add MEN on top of it and well what more can you say. Life has a way of working itself out. Your kids may of went back to dad because he has money but you will always be their mother. You've managed to get yourself out of relationships that weren't mentally healthy for you, a lot of women don't. You should be very proud of that. You put one foot in front of the other everyday and keep going. Your a strong woman remember that....Hugs ~ Elisha
Oh then you add MEN on top of it and well what more can you say. Life has a way of working itself out. Your kids may of went back to dad because he has money but you will always be their mother. You've managed to get yourself out of relationships that weren't mentally healthy for you, a lot of women don't. You should be very proud of that. You put one foot in front of the other everyday and keep going. Your a strong woman remember that....Hugs ~ Elisha
Thank you Elisha. you sound like my youngest daughter Johanna. She had to go back unwillingly because he didn't want to have to pay any support.but she tell's me I am the strongest woman she's ever met.and she knows I'll make out alright. All of my kids are proud of me and help out as much as they can. emotional support, and Kat with financial. I knew as a good mother you had to let them make their own choices in life, and I also told them be careful what you ask for. When I divorced him, he more or less divorced us all and remarried a 23 year old, who he is allowing to run the buisiness that should have been our childrens in the future. But evidently I raised them right. Kat is a Radiologist. James went back to collage and Johanna is doing well in school.so she can get a job and move in with her brother or sister to get away from him and the new wife,who tries to play mom when shes the same age as my oldest.I pray for her every night, she really has a hard time . I just miss them so much,believe it or not , it hurts more than any of this.cause it's my heart. Sorry a little more venting there, Thanks again Elisha,I'm very greatfull . You hang in there and I hope your feeling better soon, Krista
Hi Kris,
I have been hovering but not posting but your story touched my heart.
I have been married to my high school sweetheart for almost 29 years. I have always been someone's daughter, someone's wife, someone's mom. I am still all of those things but somewhere along the way I lost sight of who I am. Even though I am still married, my parents are still alive and my kids (while not at home any longer) and I are very close, it's time to figure out me. I have been on meds for depression and anxiety for about a year and I have finally found a therapist that I can relate to.
I know this was a long ramble, I just wanted you to remember that you aren't alone. HW is full of postitive, caring people who often have THE best advice that comes from experience. I don't have anything new and creative to add, just that maybe it is time to find Kris, find what is important to you.
Venting is what this place is all about! Sharing and caring and helping.
Take care . . .
Sadsunshine
I have been hovering but not posting but your story touched my heart.
I have been married to my high school sweetheart for almost 29 years. I have always been someone's daughter, someone's wife, someone's mom. I am still all of those things but somewhere along the way I lost sight of who I am. Even though I am still married, my parents are still alive and my kids (while not at home any longer) and I are very close, it's time to figure out me. I have been on meds for depression and anxiety for about a year and I have finally found a therapist that I can relate to.
I know this was a long ramble, I just wanted you to remember that you aren't alone. HW is full of postitive, caring people who often have THE best advice that comes from experience. I don't have anything new and creative to add, just that maybe it is time to find Kris, find what is important to you.
Venting is what this place is all about! Sharing and caring and helping.
Take care . . .
Sadsunshine